i'm pissed. i'm finally applying for my universities, and in canada its done with an onlie form. back four years ago, when i applied for the first time, it cost $85 to apply for you first three choices. and that was it. so why the fuck do i now have a fee of $110, and a supplementary fee of nealry $200?!
WTF!!! so i look it up under help, and there's a charge now not only to apply but depending on which university you apply to, they have their own fee, ranging from $500-70 per school!!!
so i took off one option and it's down to $250. from $85 four years ago to $205 now for TWO SCHOOLS.
this is bullshit.
and i think rob is mad because he hasn't called or anything, so i left a message asking if he could please just arrange a time to talk with me, be it some time this week or the next and if he feels he needs space too?...
because it's stressing me out and making me sad, his silence, and i don't want to think about it or be crying and shit. if i had a time i knew i was going to talk to him then i could stop thinking about it until that time came.
so in the interest of taking care of nihly and getting things done instead of sitting around being depressed, i am doing my applications. which has to be done before i go away to NZ dec 16th. because the deadline for apps is while i'm away.
but i'm not able to fully apply because in trying to pay their bullshit fees, i found out i need a number from my highschool transcripts form. so i guess now i am ordering my transcripts.
le grrrrr. it already costs enough to go to school, i think this is ridiculous.
i am looking at an option that will be cheaper for me in the end, i was at durham for arts stuff the past year and will be again in the winter. there's a university of trent at durham program (cultural studies, a broad range of arts and social sciences) which two of my teachers strongly recommended to me. this means i can get my university education while living mostly at home. SOME courses need to be done at their campus in Peterborough. but this will be cheaper and since i'm familiar with durham campus already, far more comfortable.
the other is an arts BA at guelph, where my guelph humber credits will transfer, some of them anyways, but it means living away from home and it will be far more stressful. on the other hand, i get away from home again, feel more independent and make new friends in a new environment. not that i couldn't at durham, but it would be a different place and people in guelph are more relaxed.
i miss intellectuals. i miss university. but i have come so far and i will achieve what i want to, i just have to weigh these two options now. be away from home but higher expenses? or be at home and lower expense but a possibly less fulfulling social experience?
i'm less angry now for having written this. there's not much i can do except pay the damn fees. i'm doing good despite the rob thing, its just making me stressed and sad and it's hard to stick to my guns. it's hard to think i might have to walk away from a person who has become a huge part of my life.
but i take care of me now. me first. *hug myself*
NIHLY
WTF!!! so i look it up under help, and there's a charge now not only to apply but depending on which university you apply to, they have their own fee, ranging from $500-70 per school!!!
so i took off one option and it's down to $250. from $85 four years ago to $205 now for TWO SCHOOLS.
this is bullshit.
and i think rob is mad because he hasn't called or anything, so i left a message asking if he could please just arrange a time to talk with me, be it some time this week or the next and if he feels he needs space too?...
because it's stressing me out and making me sad, his silence, and i don't want to think about it or be crying and shit. if i had a time i knew i was going to talk to him then i could stop thinking about it until that time came.
so in the interest of taking care of nihly and getting things done instead of sitting around being depressed, i am doing my applications. which has to be done before i go away to NZ dec 16th. because the deadline for apps is while i'm away.
but i'm not able to fully apply because in trying to pay their bullshit fees, i found out i need a number from my highschool transcripts form. so i guess now i am ordering my transcripts.
le grrrrr. it already costs enough to go to school, i think this is ridiculous.
i am looking at an option that will be cheaper for me in the end, i was at durham for arts stuff the past year and will be again in the winter. there's a university of trent at durham program (cultural studies, a broad range of arts and social sciences) which two of my teachers strongly recommended to me. this means i can get my university education while living mostly at home. SOME courses need to be done at their campus in Peterborough. but this will be cheaper and since i'm familiar with durham campus already, far more comfortable.
the other is an arts BA at guelph, where my guelph humber credits will transfer, some of them anyways, but it means living away from home and it will be far more stressful. on the other hand, i get away from home again, feel more independent and make new friends in a new environment. not that i couldn't at durham, but it would be a different place and people in guelph are more relaxed.
i miss intellectuals. i miss university. but i have come so far and i will achieve what i want to, i just have to weigh these two options now. be away from home but higher expenses? or be at home and lower expense but a possibly less fulfulling social experience?
i'm less angry now for having written this. there's not much i can do except pay the damn fees. i'm doing good despite the rob thing, its just making me stressed and sad and it's hard to stick to my guns. it's hard to think i might have to walk away from a person who has become a huge part of my life.
but i take care of me now. me first. *hug myself*
NIHLY
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
padre:
Well pretend you do... What procedure would you have to say to me... What messanger do you use?
meconqueso:
Yes, you focus on you. The way that he is messing up his own life does not have to bring you down too. If it does have to end, take the good from it and don't focus on the bad. And keep moving forward. you know I always gots da hugs for you.