nihly

I posted some of my artwork here in a new album. It's all out of order as far as when things were made and I'm photographing in bits and pieces. I don't have the set up to photograph the art properly yet, so they are not always the best quality but you get the idea.

A couple more books just came in the mail for me for therapy. I have six now...I had a good session yesterday and some things were pointed out to me that I didn't know I did, so that's valuable.

Fred is going to start coming with me to sessions. This might seem kinda funny, but apparently it's common practice to have a stuffed animal in the room in case and if you read the last post, alot of my feelings of security are attached to him.

I have something very difficult to tell my parents, but that won't be for a while because we have to tackle this slowly. Things have affected me more than I have realized.

But it is still nice to hear friends and family tell me I am strong. Sometimes even the strongest person they have met. I'm not the strongest person I've met, and by no means view myself in that way. I admire other people quite alot and their strength gives me strength, and I guess that's how life goes.

But I can't handle complainers. We have a younger girl at work who is 18 but it seems she just hasn't grown up all that much yet, and I try to be patient with her. I'm perhaps the most patient of all the staff now, other people are just plain mean or rude to her at this point, but she drives me crazy anyways.

I am trying to avoid missing Crush, who has been out trekking across Canada to BC for a whole 3 days now. Lol. And I kinda asked him to not phone me so I wouldn't be reminded he's gone and I could just get a lot of things done for me while he was away, sort of as my time to prove to myself I really am being independent and dealing with my shit properly. But he leaves me sweet messages of my phone every now and then anyways.

And then I miss him, even though I'm trying hard not to. I guess that's ok though. It's normal enough. Maybe the space will help him re evaluate his feelings for me and we can make things even better. Because I really like him.

I spent my day off sleeping. VDay boy and I hung out last night and talked for a long long time. So I went to bed pretty late. I have to work the May 24th weekend, a holiday weekend in Canada for my American and Brazillian friends. Oh well, at least I get paid time and a half. But it has gotten pretty cold since that thunderstorm this past week. Hopefully it gets warmer again, because it makes things a bit miserable. Last night I was wearing three coats.

And I'm babbling. Ok, cya guys!!!

NIHLY OH and CURSES get your ass back on here please I MISS YOU!!!