Life hasn't exactly been a vacation for Aimee Allen, who is the organically rebellious product of a guilt-laden Catholic school system. Signed at the tender age of 21 to Elektra Records, her debut album, I'd Start a Revolution If I Could Get Up In the Morning, got caught in the crossfire of a corporate merger and was shelved by the soon-to-be dormant label. Worse, Aimee's voice was effectively silenced for several years when the record company refused to release her from her contract without a substantial -- and unattainable -- buyout in place.
Down but not out, Aimee found new voices for her songs, which were recorded by Kevin Michael, Tila Tequila and Unwritten Law. The latter band scored a Top 5 hit on Billboard's Modern Rock chart with "Save Me," which was co-written by Aimee, Linda Perry and Unwritten Law vocalist Scott Russo. Aimee contributed lyrics to the remainder of the tracks on the band's 2005 album, Here's to the Mourning, and Scott and Aimee became romantically entwined. Their relationship culminated with a record of duets, Sitting In A Tree, but sadly the harmony off CD ended, the album's February 2007 release serving as a tombstone for the death of their relationship.
Inspired by the 2007 documentary Zeitgeist, and the work of Alex Jones, Aimee recorded a track to support politician Ron Paul's 2008 election campaign. It became the Libertarian's theme song after the accompanying video became a monster grassroots hit via YouTube. Aimee was subsequently thrust into the political spotlight, and became the voice of revolution for a generation of new voters. However Aimee soon had a more personal battle to fight, after an assault in the summer of 2008 left her with a broken jaw and serious head injuries.
She retreated to Indiana to nurse her wounds and pick up the pieces of her life. Having been the victim of aggression, a new gentler Aimee emerged. When she was well enough to venture back into the studio, the harder rock sounds of her past recordings were replaced with the warm, soothing sounds her body and soul craved. The resulting album, A Little Happiness, is a sonic haven for those needing to escape the troubles of this world. However, as Aimee explained when she stopped by the SuicideGirls office, not everyone is happy that she's taken a recess from revolution.
Nicole Powers: I know this is you first solo album release, but it's not actually your first solo album, because you had this bizarre experience with Elektra Records didn't you?
Aimee Allen: Yeah. I was on Elektra and recorded an album. It took me two years to record it and right before it was released they folded. It was a big rock album. Don Gilmore produced some stuff on it and it was almost like a female Linkin Park. Back in early 2000 it was sort of groundbreaking but nobody ever heard it.
NP: How much money did Elektra spend?
AA: $1.2 to $1.4 million.
NP: And being that young, after that much money was spent, you'd probably never even considered that it was even a possibility that the album wouldn't get released.
AA: Right. It was like going to college or something. It was a huge learning experience. I worked with so many different producers and learned how to hone my art. So it wasn't all a wash because I learned a lot, but it was a bit disappointing.
NP: And they embalmed you afterwards, as they call it, because the label didn't want to let you go, but they didn't want to release the record either.
AA: Right. So I was held hostage for several years.
NP: How many years?
AA: I think it was about five. Four or five.
NP: That's insane. So you couldn't get signed anywhere else?
AA: Couldn't re-record, could sign with anyone else. Well I could, but the label would have to pay an absolutely ridiculous amount -- it wasn't even worth talking to a label...
NP: Because they couldn't have afforded the buyout fee.
AA: Yeah. It would have been impossible. To the point of not even asking because the answer would have been no -- it was such a high number.
NP: What did you do for all that time.
AA: Well I wrote songs for the Unwritten Law album, Here's To The Mourning. Kevin Michael did a song of mine, Tila Tequila did a song of mine, I re-recorded some of the songs from my Elektra album with Scott Russo from Unwritten Law, and we did a duet album. Kind of a pop, punk, reggae-influenced SoCal sounding album. Even though I didn't have permission to do it I did that anyways, and then by the time we could release it my lawyer got me out of the Elektra deal.
But right before we released our Scott & Aimee album, we broke up. After all those years, five years or something. It was like right before every release, the last couple of releases, there's been tragedy, Elektra, Scott & Aimee. So this particular album, which comes out July 21st, is free of any bondage so I'm very excited about that. It's coming out. It's definitely coming out.
NP: But this album hasn't been without tragedy. I understand you'd just started recording the first track for it at a studio in downtown LA in the summer of 2008, and you fell victim to a crazy attack. What happened?
AA: Basically these random guys, gang members, asked me for a cigarette, and I didn't have one -- and apparently that's the wrong answer. My friend saved my life when she jumped on my face to protect me. It was her big heroic moment. Another girl that we were with took her heel and kicked one of them in the face. It was pretty awesome, but I was completely unconscious, so I wasn't there to defend myself or anything.
NP: You've got some kick-ass friends?
AA: Yeah. Pretty kick-ass for sure. But after that I went to Indiana to actually just heal and get better
NP: Because you broke your jaw?
AA: Yeah, and they cracked my head, and they stabbed me. It was just like I had to get out of Los Angeles. I had to.
NP: Have you had to deal with heinous medical bills?
AA: Yeah. [laughs] Totally. [laughs] Absolutely ridiculous medical bills.
NP: And you say that with a smile on your face.
AA: Because it's just so...I mean on top of the assault there's a financial assault. It's like this happened to me and this happened to me. Who knows what was worse...But I do genuinely feel it was the best thing that happened to me, by far, in my life. It completely changed the outlook of my life: how much I appreciate being alive, how much I appreciate my family, my friends, and each moment. It just made me a happier person.
NP: So you went to Indiana to recoup?
AA: My best friend lives there. She started a record company, Side Tracked Records, that put out the Scott & Aimee album. She has always been so supportive and loving, and she lives in a very small quiet community in Indiana. She really nursed me back to health, and got me better. She's also the president of my label so she's putting out this album through Adrenaline/ADA[URL].
NP: Was it good to get out of LA where peoples value systems are different.
AA: Yeah, that's the other thing, people are really a lot nicer there. That's another thing that made me a nicer person. People are just so giving [in a] small town. I forgot about these small, little kindnesses that we don't do in LA. I'm from Montana so it was a flashback to this small town hospitality. The community came together to make sure I was OK. It was pretty cool.
NP: And it's reflected in your music. With Elektra you'd done this big album, yet the beauty of this album is its utter simplicity.
AA: Right. That was difficult too. Because I wanted to have it be simple, and not have a bunch of tracks. Everything I've ever done has had tons of tracks and tons of production, and tons of tricks and gimmicks...It was actually hard to not have the tendency to over-produce.
NP: You were co-producing for the first time on this one.
AA: Yes. It was scary, it was really scary. First time producing, and it took a little bit [of time] to trust myself. The guy I was co-producing it with, he didn't want to push me in any direction, he didn't want to control me...He would just be like, "OK, I'll help you do it, but you have to come up with what you want." So in the beginning I was just really frustrated. I was like, "No! Give me more."
NP: You didn't have a major label pushing you into the corner they wanted you to be in.
AA: Right. And he wouldn't do it. So there was frustration for a minute but then freedom. I had to get to a place where I was like, if I like it, then that's really all that matters at this point...But now I feel confident that I could produce my next album and feel confident in my decisions versus second-guessing myself in the beginning of this album.
NP: Did you return to LA to record the album?
AA: No. The whole album I recorded in Indiana. This little Indiana studio, it's really quaint. The whole experience was just healing for me because there wasn't a lot of distraction. It gave me time to heal.
In the beginning, I didn't got there to record, I just went there to chill out. Then I decided I should not just sit around feeling sorry for myself or sit around just trying to calm down, I should just do something productive. Hence I was just going to do a small acoustic album with my songs on it. [I thought], I don't care if it gets released, or care if anyone hears it, I just need to do something that's healing for me, to get through it. Then throughout the process of it I [thought] maybe other people when they hear this, it will create some healing for them as well. At that particular point I couldn't hear, I was just so sensitive to sound. I thought, well maybe other people who are sensitive to sound will actually like the album. It won't be an overbearing assault on their senses. It'll just be something they can chill out with.
NP: I was reading an interview where you talked about how being injured changed the way you heard sounds in your head and what you were able to tolerate.
AA: I'm so much better now, but at that point the sound of a finger on a metal string, even an acoustic guitar, a metal vibration coming from the guitar just freaked me out. Totally freaked me out! I could not stand it. Quiet strumming on a metal string was like eating tin foil to me. But I got a nylon string acoustic guitar and I was like, "Ah, that sounds beautiful."
A drum kit was just out of the question. I was so jumpy from the sound of a drum kit. So I only have three songs with drum kits on the whole album and I recorded those the very last thing. Because by the time I had finished the process of recording I was like, "Wait, I can put some drums on here now." But for the whole album, for the most part, there was just a cajon, a djembe, congas -- that's it -- because I could handle those frequencies...There's no modern keyboards sounds or anything, it's all vintage, because it was just warmer and I could accept it.
NP: The warmth of the sound comes across, I made a note earlier while listening to it: "Summer on a CD."
AA: Ah, nice, thank you. "Summer on a CD." That's nice. It's weird because, you know a lot of these songs I wrote here, but I recorded them there, but I did bring this heart and soul of Southern California to Indiana.
NP: Looking at some of the lyrics it seems you also brought a lot of heartbreak with you.
AA: Right. That's the thing. It's a very yin and yang, light and dark sort of balance almost. The music's happy but the words have stories of pain and tragedy and loss, and break up after break up. I mean there's a lot of sadness in what I sing about, but I think also hope.
NP: Even on the song "Save Me" where the actual lyric is "You can't save me..."
AA: ...And then right at the end I say, "You can save me." There's hope. Like the whole of the song, you can't help me, you can't help me, and then at the very end it's like, you can. It's kind of my plea to God at that particular moment to say you can save me because you're God but I think for the rest of the people down here I'm completely unsalvageable. It's sort of the last glimmer of hope.
NP: And that was a song you wrote with Linda Perry. How did that happen?
AA: Scott Russo, he told me one day, if you tune the guitar a certain way you only have to play it with one finger...So I wrote a lot of that song and then he came in and did a little more. Then Linda Perry heard it and she wanted to help us finish it and make it more of a hit. So we all three sat down and worked on it.
NP: That song was on the Unwritten Law album and then you recorded it for this album?
AA: Correct, yeah. I wanted to go back, because when I did the one finger thing it was on acoustic guitar, and I just heard it a certain way in my head, which is how it is on this album. I just wanted to go back to the simplicity of the one-finger feeling, the seed of the song. I love Unwritten Law's version of it, but I just really wanted to record it the way I heard it. The only frustrating thing is that people think it's a cover.
NP: I know. I was reading a review and they talk about "Save Me" being an Unwritten Law cover.
AA: It kills me. Unbelievable.
NP: There's a couple of songs where you deal with your thoughts on God and organized religion: "Save Me" and "God Talks."
AA: I just feel like there's God and there's organized religion and the two aren't even close to the same thing. My particular belief is that God loves everyone. No matter what you do, God loves you. And I feel like religion teaches all this guilt. It's very tongue-in-cheek: "I went to heaven, I couldn't get in for what I have done, I said please take me, they said youre crazy, you had too much fun." That's what they teach essentially. You party too much or you're too promiscuous, or whatever, so you're going to go to hell.
There's a teaching of hate -- to hate yourself, to hate others, to judge others and judge yourself. I just struggle with that a lot in my life because I went to Catholic School and I just felt so judged, and there's a lot of Catholic guilt. So my music is trying to make my statements about it because there's not really a forum to get it out...I'm not sure if it translates, but it was social, religious, political commentary, and, in my own way, a prayer.
NP: Were you a bit gun-shy on this album to get involved in too much social and political commentary?
AA: Yeah. I didn't want to bring any aggression onto this album. No aggression or anger was allowed.
NP: Because obviously a lot of people will know you from the Ron Paul "Revolution" theme song. I guess we should first talk about how that came about. How did the hook up with Ron Paul even happen?
AA: Well my friend Lucian Piane, we watched this movie, Zeitgeist, and we watched Freedom To Fascism, and Ron Paul is in both those movies. He's a Libertarian, and he's pretty much a punk rock candidate, he just doesn't want the federal government in our business. He's like an artist's politician. We both felt like he wasn't being heard, so we did a song, and got a lot of the gay community behind it to donate their services for the music video. We did a music video for the song and Ron Paul heard it and flew me up to Minneapolis for the Rally for the Republic in this sold out arena -- everyone in the arena knew the words. The internet is so powerful. I had no idea. We did the song and the video, we had no idea that it would be as big.
NP: But now, this is the post-revolution Amy?
AA: Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness -- I guess at this point I'm in the pursuit of a little happiness. I'm feeling that life is really short and where I see injustice, it's not that I'm not going to speak up about it, it's just right now there's so much injustice I'm choosing at this particular point in my spiritual journey to not look at it. Because it's not healthy for me. It's not good for me, and I can' help anyone else with my music -- my mission of helping people feel less alone and just doing what I do -- I can't do that, I won't be able to function if I'm looking at the news everyday and getting upset. There's just no way. I cannot do it.
NP: After the attack, you can't heal the world until you've healed yourself.
AA: Yes. Well put. I cannot be a leader if I'm not taking care of myself. So right now, this chapter in my life is all about getting back on my feet, getting strong again. I'm really happy with how far I've come, but now is not the time for me to get worked up over what's going on on the TV. My family even, they're like, "We're going to have an intervention...We know that you are looking at the news because you're not talking to any of us." Which is true. I'll watch the news and just turn my phone off.
NP: So you became a news junkie?
AA: Totally. Like obsessive. Finding the injustices -- I can't stop. It's like gambling or something. It's like they're doing that? Well who paid for that? And where's the funding behind that guy? Oh, that guy knows that guy -- there's the corruption. Just absolutely like a private investigator, just constantly with a fine toothcomb finding the evil in this world. And when I dive into it, I dive into it full-on. It's hard for me to nonchalantly look at what's going on. I'm fully committed. At this particular point I'm just choosing to not look at it right now.
NP: When you look at what's going on in the world, it is such a monster shit storm, the only way to deal with it is to have some level of detachment. You have to keep the balls of shit at bay.
AA: Yes, yes, yes. Right. And it's a choice. And I think that after the assault I personally couldn't handle even just a tinge of aggression internally. Any aggression would just dissipate in me because I was allergic to my own aggression almost. I just couldn't retain it. It would just go. It would evaporate within me because I had an aversion to aggression after that.
I know that that pisses a lot of the revolutionaries off. I know it. I get hate mail all the time: "Oh, you're dong some 'Vacation' video now. You're happy. You need to continue with the revolution." But in my own way I am. It's just not in the way that they would prefer I guess, getting upset all the time, getting angry all the time. There's a different way. Love is the answer.
NP: Well anger is not always helpful. When people seep anger out through every pore you often don't hear what they say. You hear the anger in their words and you tune out.
AA: Absolutely. I tune out. I'm like a recovering political, angsty addict. [laughs]
NP: Do you think you'll find more of a balance with the next album?
AA: That would be nice. To be able to be happy and yet look at the news. But for me, there isn't that. I just can't do that. I'm either just completely miserable and upset and I don't want to talk to anyone because of it. Or I can create my own reality, which is really what the video "On Vacation" is about.
NP: The whole CD is like a vacation in your headphones.
AA: The video "On Vacation" is almost like crying so hard you're laughing. The video turns from a normal, shitty apartment -- there's papers everywhere and a leaky ceiling -- into a beautiful beach-y environment, because I've been pushed to that. I've been so upset and so low in life that you have to force yourself to be happy, or just start creating your own reality because the one you're living in is too painful. That's like the theme of the song. It's not the one-dimensional happy vacation song, it's undercurrents of tragedy and being forced to wake up and go, "You know what? Today I'm going to pretend like nothing's happening." It's like an Alice in Wonderland trip down the rabbit hole into happiness. It's like crying at the beach really.
NP: I guess you're telling your revolutionary fans, I'm on vacation.
AA: Yeah. Right. I mean I have "Revolution" tattooed on my arm. It's not going away. I've always pushed the envelope and tried to question everything my whole life. I've questioned government, religion, the police when I'm getting pulled over -- I'll ask them a million questions. Boyfriends, girlfriends, I have questioned everything in life, and I've fought against everything. I've just always been against the grain with everything my whole life but I just don't want to fight anymore with this particular record. I just want people to go, "I'm going to put it on and I'm going to be in my own reality today and nothing is going to change my world." Who needs reality? We're in a serious recession right now.
NP: People need a vacation, and they can't afford to go to Hawaii.
AA: Exactly, they can't afford to go to Hawaii, they can't afford to go to the beach. No matter where they are, when they put the album on hopefully they'll feel they relate to it, and also that they can escape to it. I just would love to let people escape from their problems. I'm big into escapism.
NP: I like to encourage people to take vacations at home. Vacation is a state of mind.
AA: Yes. Vacation is a state of mind -- absolutely. That would be awesome if I could do that for anyone, and if I did it for you that's really, really made my whole day.
NP: I was having a vacation in my office earlier when I was listening to it. I was expecting the water and sand to wash in under my door at any moment.
AA: [looks towards the door] See, look, it's happening. [laughs]
NP: So are you going to be touring?
AA: Yes. I'm touring all summer with Sugar Ray. It's going to be a nice summer fun vacation-ey party. That's from July 28th to September 26th. All the dates are on my MySpace. Fastball's touring with us too.
Then after that we're going out on a tour in the fall with a band called Quietdrive. They're really, really cool. I like them a lot. They're a really good fall band to tour with and Sugar Ray's the perfect summer tour. Hopefully people will forget about the recession-slash-depression and come out and escape, celebrating life and having fun.
NP: 'Cause that's actually the cure for the recession -- people need to forget about it. Recession is a state of mind as much as vacation is. The state of our economy all goes back to confidence.
AA: Exactly, exactly. I think about that all the time. If everyone would stop saying we're in a recession we wouldn't be in a recession. I really hope we can bring a little happiness to each city that we go to.
A Little Happiness is released on July 21, 2009.
Down but not out, Aimee found new voices for her songs, which were recorded by Kevin Michael, Tila Tequila and Unwritten Law. The latter band scored a Top 5 hit on Billboard's Modern Rock chart with "Save Me," which was co-written by Aimee, Linda Perry and Unwritten Law vocalist Scott Russo. Aimee contributed lyrics to the remainder of the tracks on the band's 2005 album, Here's to the Mourning, and Scott and Aimee became romantically entwined. Their relationship culminated with a record of duets, Sitting In A Tree, but sadly the harmony off CD ended, the album's February 2007 release serving as a tombstone for the death of their relationship.
Inspired by the 2007 documentary Zeitgeist, and the work of Alex Jones, Aimee recorded a track to support politician Ron Paul's 2008 election campaign. It became the Libertarian's theme song after the accompanying video became a monster grassroots hit via YouTube. Aimee was subsequently thrust into the political spotlight, and became the voice of revolution for a generation of new voters. However Aimee soon had a more personal battle to fight, after an assault in the summer of 2008 left her with a broken jaw and serious head injuries.
She retreated to Indiana to nurse her wounds and pick up the pieces of her life. Having been the victim of aggression, a new gentler Aimee emerged. When she was well enough to venture back into the studio, the harder rock sounds of her past recordings were replaced with the warm, soothing sounds her body and soul craved. The resulting album, A Little Happiness, is a sonic haven for those needing to escape the troubles of this world. However, as Aimee explained when she stopped by the SuicideGirls office, not everyone is happy that she's taken a recess from revolution.
Nicole Powers: I know this is you first solo album release, but it's not actually your first solo album, because you had this bizarre experience with Elektra Records didn't you?
Aimee Allen: Yeah. I was on Elektra and recorded an album. It took me two years to record it and right before it was released they folded. It was a big rock album. Don Gilmore produced some stuff on it and it was almost like a female Linkin Park. Back in early 2000 it was sort of groundbreaking but nobody ever heard it.
NP: How much money did Elektra spend?
AA: $1.2 to $1.4 million.
NP: And being that young, after that much money was spent, you'd probably never even considered that it was even a possibility that the album wouldn't get released.
AA: Right. It was like going to college or something. It was a huge learning experience. I worked with so many different producers and learned how to hone my art. So it wasn't all a wash because I learned a lot, but it was a bit disappointing.
NP: And they embalmed you afterwards, as they call it, because the label didn't want to let you go, but they didn't want to release the record either.
AA: Right. So I was held hostage for several years.
NP: How many years?
AA: I think it was about five. Four or five.
NP: That's insane. So you couldn't get signed anywhere else?
AA: Couldn't re-record, could sign with anyone else. Well I could, but the label would have to pay an absolutely ridiculous amount -- it wasn't even worth talking to a label...
NP: Because they couldn't have afforded the buyout fee.
AA: Yeah. It would have been impossible. To the point of not even asking because the answer would have been no -- it was such a high number.
NP: What did you do for all that time.
AA: Well I wrote songs for the Unwritten Law album, Here's To The Mourning. Kevin Michael did a song of mine, Tila Tequila did a song of mine, I re-recorded some of the songs from my Elektra album with Scott Russo from Unwritten Law, and we did a duet album. Kind of a pop, punk, reggae-influenced SoCal sounding album. Even though I didn't have permission to do it I did that anyways, and then by the time we could release it my lawyer got me out of the Elektra deal.
But right before we released our Scott & Aimee album, we broke up. After all those years, five years or something. It was like right before every release, the last couple of releases, there's been tragedy, Elektra, Scott & Aimee. So this particular album, which comes out July 21st, is free of any bondage so I'm very excited about that. It's coming out. It's definitely coming out.
NP: But this album hasn't been without tragedy. I understand you'd just started recording the first track for it at a studio in downtown LA in the summer of 2008, and you fell victim to a crazy attack. What happened?
AA: Basically these random guys, gang members, asked me for a cigarette, and I didn't have one -- and apparently that's the wrong answer. My friend saved my life when she jumped on my face to protect me. It was her big heroic moment. Another girl that we were with took her heel and kicked one of them in the face. It was pretty awesome, but I was completely unconscious, so I wasn't there to defend myself or anything.
NP: You've got some kick-ass friends?
AA: Yeah. Pretty kick-ass for sure. But after that I went to Indiana to actually just heal and get better
NP: Because you broke your jaw?
AA: Yeah, and they cracked my head, and they stabbed me. It was just like I had to get out of Los Angeles. I had to.
NP: Have you had to deal with heinous medical bills?
AA: Yeah. [laughs] Totally. [laughs] Absolutely ridiculous medical bills.
NP: And you say that with a smile on your face.
AA: Because it's just so...I mean on top of the assault there's a financial assault. It's like this happened to me and this happened to me. Who knows what was worse...But I do genuinely feel it was the best thing that happened to me, by far, in my life. It completely changed the outlook of my life: how much I appreciate being alive, how much I appreciate my family, my friends, and each moment. It just made me a happier person.
NP: So you went to Indiana to recoup?
AA: My best friend lives there. She started a record company, Side Tracked Records, that put out the Scott & Aimee album. She has always been so supportive and loving, and she lives in a very small quiet community in Indiana. She really nursed me back to health, and got me better. She's also the president of my label so she's putting out this album through Adrenaline/ADA[URL].
NP: Was it good to get out of LA where peoples value systems are different.
AA: Yeah, that's the other thing, people are really a lot nicer there. That's another thing that made me a nicer person. People are just so giving [in a] small town. I forgot about these small, little kindnesses that we don't do in LA. I'm from Montana so it was a flashback to this small town hospitality. The community came together to make sure I was OK. It was pretty cool.
NP: And it's reflected in your music. With Elektra you'd done this big album, yet the beauty of this album is its utter simplicity.
AA: Right. That was difficult too. Because I wanted to have it be simple, and not have a bunch of tracks. Everything I've ever done has had tons of tracks and tons of production, and tons of tricks and gimmicks...It was actually hard to not have the tendency to over-produce.
NP: You were co-producing for the first time on this one.
AA: Yes. It was scary, it was really scary. First time producing, and it took a little bit [of time] to trust myself. The guy I was co-producing it with, he didn't want to push me in any direction, he didn't want to control me...He would just be like, "OK, I'll help you do it, but you have to come up with what you want." So in the beginning I was just really frustrated. I was like, "No! Give me more."
NP: You didn't have a major label pushing you into the corner they wanted you to be in.
AA: Right. And he wouldn't do it. So there was frustration for a minute but then freedom. I had to get to a place where I was like, if I like it, then that's really all that matters at this point...But now I feel confident that I could produce my next album and feel confident in my decisions versus second-guessing myself in the beginning of this album.
NP: Did you return to LA to record the album?
AA: No. The whole album I recorded in Indiana. This little Indiana studio, it's really quaint. The whole experience was just healing for me because there wasn't a lot of distraction. It gave me time to heal.
In the beginning, I didn't got there to record, I just went there to chill out. Then I decided I should not just sit around feeling sorry for myself or sit around just trying to calm down, I should just do something productive. Hence I was just going to do a small acoustic album with my songs on it. [I thought], I don't care if it gets released, or care if anyone hears it, I just need to do something that's healing for me, to get through it. Then throughout the process of it I [thought] maybe other people when they hear this, it will create some healing for them as well. At that particular point I couldn't hear, I was just so sensitive to sound. I thought, well maybe other people who are sensitive to sound will actually like the album. It won't be an overbearing assault on their senses. It'll just be something they can chill out with.
NP: I was reading an interview where you talked about how being injured changed the way you heard sounds in your head and what you were able to tolerate.
AA: I'm so much better now, but at that point the sound of a finger on a metal string, even an acoustic guitar, a metal vibration coming from the guitar just freaked me out. Totally freaked me out! I could not stand it. Quiet strumming on a metal string was like eating tin foil to me. But I got a nylon string acoustic guitar and I was like, "Ah, that sounds beautiful."
A drum kit was just out of the question. I was so jumpy from the sound of a drum kit. So I only have three songs with drum kits on the whole album and I recorded those the very last thing. Because by the time I had finished the process of recording I was like, "Wait, I can put some drums on here now." But for the whole album, for the most part, there was just a cajon, a djembe, congas -- that's it -- because I could handle those frequencies...There's no modern keyboards sounds or anything, it's all vintage, because it was just warmer and I could accept it.
NP: The warmth of the sound comes across, I made a note earlier while listening to it: "Summer on a CD."
AA: Ah, nice, thank you. "Summer on a CD." That's nice. It's weird because, you know a lot of these songs I wrote here, but I recorded them there, but I did bring this heart and soul of Southern California to Indiana.
NP: Looking at some of the lyrics it seems you also brought a lot of heartbreak with you.
AA: Right. That's the thing. It's a very yin and yang, light and dark sort of balance almost. The music's happy but the words have stories of pain and tragedy and loss, and break up after break up. I mean there's a lot of sadness in what I sing about, but I think also hope.
NP: Even on the song "Save Me" where the actual lyric is "You can't save me..."
AA: ...And then right at the end I say, "You can save me." There's hope. Like the whole of the song, you can't help me, you can't help me, and then at the very end it's like, you can. It's kind of my plea to God at that particular moment to say you can save me because you're God but I think for the rest of the people down here I'm completely unsalvageable. It's sort of the last glimmer of hope.
NP: And that was a song you wrote with Linda Perry. How did that happen?
AA: Scott Russo, he told me one day, if you tune the guitar a certain way you only have to play it with one finger...So I wrote a lot of that song and then he came in and did a little more. Then Linda Perry heard it and she wanted to help us finish it and make it more of a hit. So we all three sat down and worked on it.
NP: That song was on the Unwritten Law album and then you recorded it for this album?
AA: Correct, yeah. I wanted to go back, because when I did the one finger thing it was on acoustic guitar, and I just heard it a certain way in my head, which is how it is on this album. I just wanted to go back to the simplicity of the one-finger feeling, the seed of the song. I love Unwritten Law's version of it, but I just really wanted to record it the way I heard it. The only frustrating thing is that people think it's a cover.
NP: I know. I was reading a review and they talk about "Save Me" being an Unwritten Law cover.
AA: It kills me. Unbelievable.
NP: There's a couple of songs where you deal with your thoughts on God and organized religion: "Save Me" and "God Talks."
AA: I just feel like there's God and there's organized religion and the two aren't even close to the same thing. My particular belief is that God loves everyone. No matter what you do, God loves you. And I feel like religion teaches all this guilt. It's very tongue-in-cheek: "I went to heaven, I couldn't get in for what I have done, I said please take me, they said youre crazy, you had too much fun." That's what they teach essentially. You party too much or you're too promiscuous, or whatever, so you're going to go to hell.
There's a teaching of hate -- to hate yourself, to hate others, to judge others and judge yourself. I just struggle with that a lot in my life because I went to Catholic School and I just felt so judged, and there's a lot of Catholic guilt. So my music is trying to make my statements about it because there's not really a forum to get it out...I'm not sure if it translates, but it was social, religious, political commentary, and, in my own way, a prayer.
NP: Were you a bit gun-shy on this album to get involved in too much social and political commentary?
AA: Yeah. I didn't want to bring any aggression onto this album. No aggression or anger was allowed.
NP: Because obviously a lot of people will know you from the Ron Paul "Revolution" theme song. I guess we should first talk about how that came about. How did the hook up with Ron Paul even happen?
AA: Well my friend Lucian Piane, we watched this movie, Zeitgeist, and we watched Freedom To Fascism, and Ron Paul is in both those movies. He's a Libertarian, and he's pretty much a punk rock candidate, he just doesn't want the federal government in our business. He's like an artist's politician. We both felt like he wasn't being heard, so we did a song, and got a lot of the gay community behind it to donate their services for the music video. We did a music video for the song and Ron Paul heard it and flew me up to Minneapolis for the Rally for the Republic in this sold out arena -- everyone in the arena knew the words. The internet is so powerful. I had no idea. We did the song and the video, we had no idea that it would be as big.
NP: But now, this is the post-revolution Amy?
AA: Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness -- I guess at this point I'm in the pursuit of a little happiness. I'm feeling that life is really short and where I see injustice, it's not that I'm not going to speak up about it, it's just right now there's so much injustice I'm choosing at this particular point in my spiritual journey to not look at it. Because it's not healthy for me. It's not good for me, and I can' help anyone else with my music -- my mission of helping people feel less alone and just doing what I do -- I can't do that, I won't be able to function if I'm looking at the news everyday and getting upset. There's just no way. I cannot do it.
NP: After the attack, you can't heal the world until you've healed yourself.
AA: Yes. Well put. I cannot be a leader if I'm not taking care of myself. So right now, this chapter in my life is all about getting back on my feet, getting strong again. I'm really happy with how far I've come, but now is not the time for me to get worked up over what's going on on the TV. My family even, they're like, "We're going to have an intervention...We know that you are looking at the news because you're not talking to any of us." Which is true. I'll watch the news and just turn my phone off.
NP: So you became a news junkie?
AA: Totally. Like obsessive. Finding the injustices -- I can't stop. It's like gambling or something. It's like they're doing that? Well who paid for that? And where's the funding behind that guy? Oh, that guy knows that guy -- there's the corruption. Just absolutely like a private investigator, just constantly with a fine toothcomb finding the evil in this world. And when I dive into it, I dive into it full-on. It's hard for me to nonchalantly look at what's going on. I'm fully committed. At this particular point I'm just choosing to not look at it right now.
NP: When you look at what's going on in the world, it is such a monster shit storm, the only way to deal with it is to have some level of detachment. You have to keep the balls of shit at bay.
AA: Yes, yes, yes. Right. And it's a choice. And I think that after the assault I personally couldn't handle even just a tinge of aggression internally. Any aggression would just dissipate in me because I was allergic to my own aggression almost. I just couldn't retain it. It would just go. It would evaporate within me because I had an aversion to aggression after that.
I know that that pisses a lot of the revolutionaries off. I know it. I get hate mail all the time: "Oh, you're dong some 'Vacation' video now. You're happy. You need to continue with the revolution." But in my own way I am. It's just not in the way that they would prefer I guess, getting upset all the time, getting angry all the time. There's a different way. Love is the answer.
NP: Well anger is not always helpful. When people seep anger out through every pore you often don't hear what they say. You hear the anger in their words and you tune out.
AA: Absolutely. I tune out. I'm like a recovering political, angsty addict. [laughs]
NP: Do you think you'll find more of a balance with the next album?
AA: That would be nice. To be able to be happy and yet look at the news. But for me, there isn't that. I just can't do that. I'm either just completely miserable and upset and I don't want to talk to anyone because of it. Or I can create my own reality, which is really what the video "On Vacation" is about.
NP: The whole CD is like a vacation in your headphones.
AA: The video "On Vacation" is almost like crying so hard you're laughing. The video turns from a normal, shitty apartment -- there's papers everywhere and a leaky ceiling -- into a beautiful beach-y environment, because I've been pushed to that. I've been so upset and so low in life that you have to force yourself to be happy, or just start creating your own reality because the one you're living in is too painful. That's like the theme of the song. It's not the one-dimensional happy vacation song, it's undercurrents of tragedy and being forced to wake up and go, "You know what? Today I'm going to pretend like nothing's happening." It's like an Alice in Wonderland trip down the rabbit hole into happiness. It's like crying at the beach really.
NP: I guess you're telling your revolutionary fans, I'm on vacation.
AA: Yeah. Right. I mean I have "Revolution" tattooed on my arm. It's not going away. I've always pushed the envelope and tried to question everything my whole life. I've questioned government, religion, the police when I'm getting pulled over -- I'll ask them a million questions. Boyfriends, girlfriends, I have questioned everything in life, and I've fought against everything. I've just always been against the grain with everything my whole life but I just don't want to fight anymore with this particular record. I just want people to go, "I'm going to put it on and I'm going to be in my own reality today and nothing is going to change my world." Who needs reality? We're in a serious recession right now.
NP: People need a vacation, and they can't afford to go to Hawaii.
AA: Exactly, they can't afford to go to Hawaii, they can't afford to go to the beach. No matter where they are, when they put the album on hopefully they'll feel they relate to it, and also that they can escape to it. I just would love to let people escape from their problems. I'm big into escapism.
NP: I like to encourage people to take vacations at home. Vacation is a state of mind.
AA: Yes. Vacation is a state of mind -- absolutely. That would be awesome if I could do that for anyone, and if I did it for you that's really, really made my whole day.
NP: I was having a vacation in my office earlier when I was listening to it. I was expecting the water and sand to wash in under my door at any moment.
AA: [looks towards the door] See, look, it's happening. [laughs]
NP: So are you going to be touring?
AA: Yes. I'm touring all summer with Sugar Ray. It's going to be a nice summer fun vacation-ey party. That's from July 28th to September 26th. All the dates are on my MySpace. Fastball's touring with us too.
Then after that we're going out on a tour in the fall with a band called Quietdrive. They're really, really cool. I like them a lot. They're a really good fall band to tour with and Sugar Ray's the perfect summer tour. Hopefully people will forget about the recession-slash-depression and come out and escape, celebrating life and having fun.
NP: 'Cause that's actually the cure for the recession -- people need to forget about it. Recession is a state of mind as much as vacation is. The state of our economy all goes back to confidence.
AA: Exactly, exactly. I think about that all the time. If everyone would stop saying we're in a recession we wouldn't be in a recession. I really hope we can bring a little happiness to each city that we go to.
A Little Happiness is released on July 21, 2009.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
crazyben:
Wait a minute, how is libertarianism "the voice of a voter's revolution"? Wealthy British aristocrats/members of the gentry came up with the ideology of libertarianism to justify why both the growing English middle-class and the British government-- just flexing its imperial muscles around the Third World-- should not be allowed to tell the independently wealthy what to do. "On Liberty", "Utilitarianism", and later, "Anarchy, State, Utopia" are representative works, and each tries to prove the philosophical proposition that that government which does nothing for its citizens is best...
crazyben:
Not to say that the interview itself wasn't interesting. I shall certainly give Allen a listening-to on iTunes sometime soon.