Well folks it is now completly over with the husband and I. I went to my house today to meet up with him and after he beat my ass we discussed things..... we are no longer together and I am free to do as I please. Other than being sore from all the bruises i am one happy lady. I then drove all the way back to Williamsburg where I belong and I don't have to see him again until Wednesday. I am sooo happy we no longer have to lie or keep shit from each other... we will be living together until I find my own place and a job but he will start the paperwork for the divorce on the 15th. I get the kids and will let them visit there father on the weekends if he stays sober.... I am so happy things are finally over. 
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Humans are so much more complex then that. Im sure he does have good qualities or the potential to be a great guy.. and thats what you saw.. human tendency is to hope for the best ... he might not be healthy but with professional help perhaps we will become more of that person you saw the potential for him to be. Until then you are very smart to be with the kids when they are with him.
much love honey. Youve taken the first step of better days.