warning: deep thoughts follow
today i walked across campus to move my car in order to better facilitate my escape from this place. it's strange how some place you pay to go to can seem so much like a prison. i walked on the grass instead of the sidewalks my tuition money pays for the upkeep of. i reached the base of a small hill and all i could see was the green of the grass. green in front of me and green to the left and to the right. i didn't look behind me because i knew it wasn't green. then i totally forgot where i was. first it made me smile and then it made me dizzy. if i'd had my books with me, i would have left. at that moment, anything at all could have been at the top of that little hill. the base of that hill was sort of an analogy for life. green, optimism, life all around me, looking behind ruins it all...
being who i am, i started to think about the past, the impermenance of things. someone who was supposed to be my "best friend forever" is now someone's wife, and by default, his best friend. i have a new best friend, who i can't imagine living without. someone who i once loved intensely is now someone's husband, and a totally different person from the one that i fell in love with. i have come to realise that there can be a difference between "the perfect man to me" and "the perfect man for me." i know them both. i now know the difference. i also now understand the difference between a "crush" and a "relationship." i understand that sometime, i will have to grow up.
oooh, life is funny!
today i walked across campus to move my car in order to better facilitate my escape from this place. it's strange how some place you pay to go to can seem so much like a prison. i walked on the grass instead of the sidewalks my tuition money pays for the upkeep of. i reached the base of a small hill and all i could see was the green of the grass. green in front of me and green to the left and to the right. i didn't look behind me because i knew it wasn't green. then i totally forgot where i was. first it made me smile and then it made me dizzy. if i'd had my books with me, i would have left. at that moment, anything at all could have been at the top of that little hill. the base of that hill was sort of an analogy for life. green, optimism, life all around me, looking behind ruins it all...
being who i am, i started to think about the past, the impermenance of things. someone who was supposed to be my "best friend forever" is now someone's wife, and by default, his best friend. i have a new best friend, who i can't imagine living without. someone who i once loved intensely is now someone's husband, and a totally different person from the one that i fell in love with. i have come to realise that there can be a difference between "the perfect man to me" and "the perfect man for me." i know them both. i now know the difference. i also now understand the difference between a "crush" and a "relationship." i understand that sometime, i will have to grow up.
oooh, life is funny!
I work at TeeJaye's off of Brice Rd. in Reynoldsburg. I start on Wednesday, and I'll be going on shift at 6am.
I know, I had to grow up not too long ago, but that doesn't mean growing out of some things.