nakedsuperhero

OK, so Learned Ladies (aka Bitches Who Know Shit) is almost over, 3 more shows guys and you'll have me back full swing.

Nevertheless, I need some advice from the women of the world. I normally consider myself to be a reasonable person; I rarely raise my voice, I like to talk out my problems, what can I say? I'm a Libra damnit.

I have, of late, gotten a girlfriend that I am in love with. We both say it out loud, and since the only other women I've ever said "I love you" to is my my mom and sister, it feels good.

But, when we have fights it usually goes like this. Whether she realizes it or not, she pushes my buttons by putting these sarcastic one liners into otherwise healthy conversation; "I feel like you're only acting around me", "you're just in this for what you can get out of it", "oh please, I don't trust you..." you get the idea. Hurtful, right? But she says them so passive aggressively, how could she KNOW she was being mean? So I tell her. "God, you're being mean tonight. Lighten up, huh?" To which point she responds, "I'm being mean? Alright, you're cut off." And refuses to kiss me, hold me, etc. So of course I feel like I'm the one that's being shitty. Then, if I retaliate (and yes, I make mistakes too) and push one of her buttons, like accidentally mention a mutual friend she slept with before we dated, she gets pouty and its like she's the ONLY ONE entitled to be mad.

Worst of all, she might as well be president of her sorority, which isn't bad in itself, but I basically have 42 girlfriends. She vents to one and soon everyone knows and is either A. Mad at me, or B. Offering me advice on a relationship that's only 2 people big. And when I confront her anger with my own, she gets upset that I'M angry, like I'm not allowed to be. Last night, when everything above came to pass from an otherwise nice evening alone, I pull one of her "Alright...goodnights" where I just turn to leave and don't go for the goodnight kiss, and she can't take it, so she comes into the hallway to ask why I'm mad. When I mention that I can't stand the one liners, she looks at me, backs away, and says "Alright, well tomorrow's a new day, so maybe you'll like me more then." What the HELL IS THAT?!? I may be angry but I can still say I love you, and if you WANT to talk about why I'm upset, don't turn around and leave me standing there balls out, upset that I just told you why I'm pissed. That isn't right. So she turned around, didn't say goodnight, and walked to her room, like it was wrong of me not to just eat shit and apologize.

My mom always said "Dont go to bed angry" and that's exactly what I did, and she KNOWS I can't stand that. I like to work my problems out like an adult, and I just dont think she understands that relationships are HARD. She'd prefer to just write bad nights off as nonexistant and then never mention them again, and that's the fastest way towards resentment I've ever heard. I dunno. I'm going to try to tell all this to her, but is there something I'm not seeing from a woman's perspective? Feel free to fill me in ladies, because I'm lost...