mythos_

Transatlantic politics
by me.

Obama, you're a fucking POPSTAR!
(and I mean that in a good way)

Yes, we love Obama, we do. Germany would totally vote for Obama and not for that other guy*. But we are not Americans, so we can't. We can just cheer for him, because he is our new Popstar. Hooooray!

At least the media says, that Germany loves Obama, and who can you trust, if not the big media. If they say, that I love him, I believe them. Hooray for Obama!
The latest shit was his speach in front of the Berlin Siegessule. I have not heard it, probably had something else to do (like loitering around or something) but they say it was good. He should make a CD of it, I would totally download it illegally from the internet. Hooray.

Yes, he was not allowed to speak at the Brandenburger Tor. We would have probably loved him even more if he had made the Kennedy and said "Ich bin ein Berliner" (I am a Berliner). But someone thought he has to win this 2nd election first.
Anyway, I just heard a song in the radio - sung by the moderators themselves but anyway, that was the last thing I needed to declare him a popstar.

Sooo, why should you vote him and not that other guy?

1. Race: Obama is black and it would totally show, that you are no racists, if you vote for him, And we Western Yuropeans are totally not racists, too (as long as Obama is not from eastern europe, is he? ** ), so we would totally like you, with a black president.

2. Jack Bauer has a black president, too: Yeah, Obama is much more like the cool Mr. President in 24 and some movies. He is also much younger then that other guy, so, although the color does not fit, I could imagine him much more to climp into a F-16 and shoot down some aliens. Hooray.

3. Planet-wide savety: We were a bit worried about your Bush-Guy. He is not Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and he is not Kim Jong-il but after them... You know, you amerians, you have a lot of nuclear weapons and once all your soldiers are dead or deserted in your not-so-funny war somewhere in the desert, who knows who you bomb. We would totally feel saver if your next president would be whoever is not the successor of Bush. And this is Obama.
Okay, in Europe, we are quite save from your Nukes. You like our cars and stuff and it would be bad buisness to bomb us. ... But then again, once the World's oil gets traded in uro and your gas-prices increase another 50-100% of what it is now, knowbody knows how desperate a trigger-happy president might be.

4. Obama has allready won, I heard it in the news: Wasn't the election the one where he won against Hillary Clinton? No it wasn't? Strange, here, we vote our leaders in one big election, though I have to admit, that a series one 1on1 battles is a lot more manly. Anyway, Obama has won his first round battle, that other guy got a free ticked to the finals, that makes Obama the favorite for the win by pure statistics!

But then, there is also a counter-position.

5. Billy Boy Clinton was also an okay guy. But under him, your nations finances were like ... black numbers.
And then came Bush and he was definitly the best president to happen to the European economics, ever. Protectoristic trade decissions that you just could not afford. A war that is both: A bad idea to begin with and executed poorly. And suddenly we get anything we can pay in dollars for cheap, because your currency has lost so much of it's value. 4 more years of such a politic and we can even affort big, expencive, american cars.

Well, I don't know who you vote but should Obama loose, he can still win the Charts with a rap video, or something.


*: Me knows that other guys name but me is from the internetz and tries to speak for the average german, who is not.
**: Me thinks borders are big shit and and we should work hard to smash the idea of race and diffrent nationalities in our lifetime. But me is a minority.

Disclaimer: This blog was researched poorly. Important facts might have been ignored for a joke ... and a bad one on top of it.