Let's see how long I can stay coherrent in this post. I just took a melatonin and some nyquil. Actually now that I started writing this that might have been all I wanted to say. Today was a really good day aside from the allergies part. And I bought a better speaker cabinet for my guitar for a great price from an EZ Pawn. I really gotta start replinishing some of this money I keep spending instead of accelerating my spending rate.
Okay right, I got a subject now! So the other day I got insulted on a message board by a stranger and it bothered me for some reason. So I got bothered that I was bothered, which is an often occurance with me, and started wondering why a complete stranger insulting me would bug me. So I came to the conclusion that I view people all wrong.
This is how I was viewing people in a nutshell. Some people are better than other people currently. But people who aren't so good can become just as good as someone who is if they apply themselves.
The problem with this lies in that if someone I don't think is doing well insults me in such a fashion as to imply their better than me, the instinct reason is to find a round about way of informing them, no you got it all wrong. I go to school, teach guitar, and have a crappy job, while you just have that crappy job. And that's really a horrible thing to say. I mean I usually say it in a different way but I tend to be a pretty blunt person.
Anyway so I need to find a better way of thinking of people who only have that crappy job or who do something I find moralistically distasteful. It is a rather two dimensional method I developed. I'm keeping the part where anyone can do anything cause well... I feel like I owe all my musical ability to that one.
Ok mediciene's kicking in. Later.
Okay right, I got a subject now! So the other day I got insulted on a message board by a stranger and it bothered me for some reason. So I got bothered that I was bothered, which is an often occurance with me, and started wondering why a complete stranger insulting me would bug me. So I came to the conclusion that I view people all wrong.
This is how I was viewing people in a nutshell. Some people are better than other people currently. But people who aren't so good can become just as good as someone who is if they apply themselves.
The problem with this lies in that if someone I don't think is doing well insults me in such a fashion as to imply their better than me, the instinct reason is to find a round about way of informing them, no you got it all wrong. I go to school, teach guitar, and have a crappy job, while you just have that crappy job. And that's really a horrible thing to say. I mean I usually say it in a different way but I tend to be a pretty blunt person.
Anyway so I need to find a better way of thinking of people who only have that crappy job or who do something I find moralistically distasteful. It is a rather two dimensional method I developed. I'm keeping the part where anyone can do anything cause well... I feel like I owe all my musical ability to that one.
Ok mediciene's kicking in. Later.
Anyway, when I am in this situation I look to see if the person is attacking me personally or just stating an opinion that I don't agree with or even an opinion that I just don't like. Most of the time it turns out that I am angered by someone not agreeing with me, which is irrational, and not the American way, right?
And the "I am better than you" thoughts you have are good healthy thoughts to have internally. But I think it would be anti-social to share them with anyone other than a close friend, even an anonymous person. But I do really believe that part of good self-esteem includes being cocky and confident about your own talents within your own mind.
One last thought, a cynical one, the older I am the more I have come to realize life is just easier the more you kiss ass.