I was reading Rainwolfkin's journal about her clicky wrist and black hand and it jogged a few memories about various injuries I have sustained over the years. I find it interesting that each of them carries an amusing anecdote or memory. It's funny how Time heals everything. I list them below:-
Scars
Forehead
I have a diagonal one inch scar in the centre of my forehead. I was 4 at the time and riding my tricycle up and down the path in my back garden. My brother came to join me and decided it would be fun to push me around the garden. It was fun for the time until he, not maliciously but without thinking, gave me an almighty shove. I remember panicing because I wasn't used to such speed and screamed. Screamed because I was scared and screamed because I couldn't work out how to stop myself hurtling down the stone steps which lead to the lower garden. Gravity got the better of me and I tumbled face first down the steps, my red tricycle following close behind. Just to add insult to injury it indignantly landed on top of my crumpled torso.
Right hand, palm
I was 12 and standing underneath a conker tree with a friend. Desperate to relieve the tree of it's conkers we were searching for sticks to throw in to it's branches; my eyes landed on a large piece of fence post. Without checking I grabbed the post and launched it up in to the welcoming tree......closely followed by a stream of crimson blood. It transpires the fence post still had a rusty nail in one end; a nail which embedded itself in the cente of my palm and sliced all the way up to the base of my index finger knuckle. I stood there in awe for a short while because that was the first time I had ever seen a real bone. I was actually looking inside my hand, veins and everything.
Left hand, palm
There used to be a huuuuuge bank of earth in the north end of a field at school, which was left after building and excavation work. My brothers and I used to rip the seats off the wooden school seats and use them as makeshift sledges, hurtling down the bank at breakneck speed. On one occasion I found muself having to make a snap decision - do I face certain death by crashing in to a tree I was heading for or do I bail out and grab something to slow me down? I bailed out to the left and grabbed the first thing my fingers touched...a piece of broken bottle. My brothers got in to so much trouble for allowing me to slice open my other hand.
Left hand, knuckle
Have you seen the film Alien? The scene where the guy has his hand palm-down on a table and is stabbing a knife in the gaps between his fingers? I am very, very good and very, very fast at that. Often, people are in awe of my ability. Except the one time my attention was distracted and I miss judged. I now have a knife wound through my hand, between the knuckles of my little finger and the one next to it.
Broken Bones
Right Foot
I was playing football when some fuckwit decided that, rather than tackle me he would stamp on my foot. I thought nothing of it at the time but ws in immense pain by the end of the day. My mum refused to take me to the hospital for two days because she thought I was faking in an attempt to get out of double History on Thursday mornings. It was only when I told her I wanted to miss double Maths that she took me to the x-ray department at hospital. I had a crack on the side of my foot and two broken toes.
Coccyx
Before you start - that's the tail end of your spine. It does not mean I have broken my willy.
I was playing football again and went in for a sliding tackle. I got the ball; my opponent mis-timed his challenge and kicked me square in the base of my back. I sat funny for a time after that while it healed which, unfortunately, has directly resulted in my slipped disc problem.
Thumbs
I have, on seperate occasions playing football, dislocated both of my thumbs.
Considering some of the dangerous shit I have gotten up to over the years I don't think that is a bad list.
So, come on. Tell me about your non-self-inflicted injuries...
Scars
Forehead
I have a diagonal one inch scar in the centre of my forehead. I was 4 at the time and riding my tricycle up and down the path in my back garden. My brother came to join me and decided it would be fun to push me around the garden. It was fun for the time until he, not maliciously but without thinking, gave me an almighty shove. I remember panicing because I wasn't used to such speed and screamed. Screamed because I was scared and screamed because I couldn't work out how to stop myself hurtling down the stone steps which lead to the lower garden. Gravity got the better of me and I tumbled face first down the steps, my red tricycle following close behind. Just to add insult to injury it indignantly landed on top of my crumpled torso.
Right hand, palm
I was 12 and standing underneath a conker tree with a friend. Desperate to relieve the tree of it's conkers we were searching for sticks to throw in to it's branches; my eyes landed on a large piece of fence post. Without checking I grabbed the post and launched it up in to the welcoming tree......closely followed by a stream of crimson blood. It transpires the fence post still had a rusty nail in one end; a nail which embedded itself in the cente of my palm and sliced all the way up to the base of my index finger knuckle. I stood there in awe for a short while because that was the first time I had ever seen a real bone. I was actually looking inside my hand, veins and everything.
Left hand, palm
There used to be a huuuuuge bank of earth in the north end of a field at school, which was left after building and excavation work. My brothers and I used to rip the seats off the wooden school seats and use them as makeshift sledges, hurtling down the bank at breakneck speed. On one occasion I found muself having to make a snap decision - do I face certain death by crashing in to a tree I was heading for or do I bail out and grab something to slow me down? I bailed out to the left and grabbed the first thing my fingers touched...a piece of broken bottle. My brothers got in to so much trouble for allowing me to slice open my other hand.
Left hand, knuckle
Have you seen the film Alien? The scene where the guy has his hand palm-down on a table and is stabbing a knife in the gaps between his fingers? I am very, very good and very, very fast at that. Often, people are in awe of my ability. Except the one time my attention was distracted and I miss judged. I now have a knife wound through my hand, between the knuckles of my little finger and the one next to it.
Broken Bones
Right Foot
I was playing football when some fuckwit decided that, rather than tackle me he would stamp on my foot. I thought nothing of it at the time but ws in immense pain by the end of the day. My mum refused to take me to the hospital for two days because she thought I was faking in an attempt to get out of double History on Thursday mornings. It was only when I told her I wanted to miss double Maths that she took me to the x-ray department at hospital. I had a crack on the side of my foot and two broken toes.
Coccyx
Before you start - that's the tail end of your spine. It does not mean I have broken my willy.
I was playing football again and went in for a sliding tackle. I got the ball; my opponent mis-timed his challenge and kicked me square in the base of my back. I sat funny for a time after that while it healed which, unfortunately, has directly resulted in my slipped disc problem.
Thumbs
I have, on seperate occasions playing football, dislocated both of my thumbs.
Considering some of the dangerous shit I have gotten up to over the years I don't think that is a bad list.
So, come on. Tell me about your non-self-inflicted injuries...
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I also was blamed for my sister's broken collar bone. She fell off the bed. Sure, I was there too, on the bed, but I didn't push her. No siree. She jumped straight off it. The tragedy of suicidal 4 year olds.