I've been a lurker here for too long.
I have not kept an ongoing blog for quite some time. Come to think of it, I haven't done a whole lot of writing in recent history. It's beginning to get to me. I think I need to get some words out of my head, even if they are to total strangers.
Instead of opening up the whole can of worms so to speak, I'll do this with baby steps. My last true blog referenced me letting go of my unicorns. Let's follow up on that.
It's done. I have let go of all those girls I spent years pining over while chasing after them on a treadmill. I didn't even realize it at first. However, when I recently heard some sappy "I miss you" sort of love song I realized, I don't miss anyone. It didn't take some hard goodbye or maybe another time or even a phone call or text. I just took my ball and went home, and I couldn't be happier.
As it turns out, my ball is pretty awesome. For once I am where and who I want to be. I'm married. Just bought our first house. Raising my soon to be kindergartener. About to earn my business degree. My life's not perfect, but I'm making the most of it and starting to enjoy it.
It's not perfect. I still have these tempting moments to set fire to everything and walk away. The old me who can't accept that I might deserve this peaceful life and would rather ruin it. The kind that wants to be dangerously flirtatious with some girl I just met or drop out of school and catch up on video games. If this is how it feels to stay in most nights, I don't ever want to know what addiction is.
I think I've rambled enough for one night. I'll be around. All of you who are interested, just send me a message and we can catch up. Until then...