It's not that I don't think about you.
It's not that you don't cross my mind.
It's the aisle I know your headed down.
And by your side it won't be mine.
I'd like to think that I can change.
That I could simply walk away.
With these terms of endearment.
And you'd go on believing that I'm happy for you.
Some words I wrote not long ago in a sing-song way of expressing my thoughts. It seems I should explain a little before I go much further...
In my life, I chase unicorns. Not the mythical creature. However, what I do chase is just as elusive. To me, a unicorn is my perfect woman. To be honest, I have several unicorns. And if you would line them all up together, all you could probably say they shared in common was that they were all female. To me, these are all women that a part of me will always love and continue to seek. Some of them were once mine per se, or rather we once shared a romatic relationship. Others merely kindred spirits that I have shared a connection with and hold a desire to further explore. Alas, either they do not feel as I do or life simply raised obstacles too complex for us to overcome. I still try, however, to keep these beautiful creatures in my life, if only to view from afar. It is the typical, bitter-sweet feeling I experience watching them move on in thier own lives and find love elsewhere. A part of me wishes to see loves fail so that I could have my chance, or even second chance to be everything they need and more. But I never share that notion. Just smile and wish them the best. In truth, most of these girls don't even know they are a unicorn to me. They might know that I feel something for them, because I'm quite terrible at hiding my feelings. But they don't know the level of which I care, or how I truly feel. At least one does, possibly more. They keep living thier lives, no knocking on my door. In fact, two of my unicorns were wed this past weekend. I was invited to one of the weddings, and thankfully I couldn't attend and had the alibi of being out of the state. Had I been there, I'm sure my true feelings would shine throught plain as day. I want them to be happy, but I hope maybe one of them might want to find happiness with me someday. For now, I'll paint those unicorns beyond my reach black and put them on the shelf.
It's not that you don't cross my mind.
It's the aisle I know your headed down.
And by your side it won't be mine.
I'd like to think that I can change.
That I could simply walk away.
With these terms of endearment.
And you'd go on believing that I'm happy for you.
Some words I wrote not long ago in a sing-song way of expressing my thoughts. It seems I should explain a little before I go much further...
In my life, I chase unicorns. Not the mythical creature. However, what I do chase is just as elusive. To me, a unicorn is my perfect woman. To be honest, I have several unicorns. And if you would line them all up together, all you could probably say they shared in common was that they were all female. To me, these are all women that a part of me will always love and continue to seek. Some of them were once mine per se, or rather we once shared a romatic relationship. Others merely kindred spirits that I have shared a connection with and hold a desire to further explore. Alas, either they do not feel as I do or life simply raised obstacles too complex for us to overcome. I still try, however, to keep these beautiful creatures in my life, if only to view from afar. It is the typical, bitter-sweet feeling I experience watching them move on in thier own lives and find love elsewhere. A part of me wishes to see loves fail so that I could have my chance, or even second chance to be everything they need and more. But I never share that notion. Just smile and wish them the best. In truth, most of these girls don't even know they are a unicorn to me. They might know that I feel something for them, because I'm quite terrible at hiding my feelings. But they don't know the level of which I care, or how I truly feel. At least one does, possibly more. They keep living thier lives, no knocking on my door. In fact, two of my unicorns were wed this past weekend. I was invited to one of the weddings, and thankfully I couldn't attend and had the alibi of being out of the state. Had I been there, I'm sure my true feelings would shine throught plain as day. I want them to be happy, but I hope maybe one of them might want to find happiness with me someday. For now, I'll paint those unicorns beyond my reach black and put them on the shelf.
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Also: "Alas, either they do not feel as I do or life simply raised obstacles too complex for us to overcome." Thank you for understanding that about life. Freaking respectable, man.
I wish I didn't. Not trying to sound emo or beg for sympathy, but I learned a long time ago that we can't always have the things we want. So I learned to accept things. It still sucks, but I do my best to move on. That part can be tricky.