mrcrisp

i'm not usually one to complain about the little things, but now i have to work on the weekend, my boss (who really wants to put me on hold) is still waiting for the doc's approval, i'm on another pain medication, and i actually came close to tears today out of sheer frustration and pain. i'm sick of getting jerked off. if i wanted to get jerked off, i'd fucking do it myself. i need to get put on hold now, because if i don't, not only will i have to continue to work on a busted leg, but i'll also fall so far behind that i'll either get kicked into some remedial program (which would be nothing but more stressful) or i get masted for falling behind too fucking far (which means i get punished for shit that's out of my control). so yeah, i'm sure stress is the best thing for me to fucking have to deal with right now, doc. please, sit on your fucking decision a little longer while i suffer for your procrastination and hesitation to delay my progression through the pipeline. my success, you said, is what you're basing your decision on. my health, i say, is more fucking important right now.

apparently i'm getting paid $1k every other week now. sure, that's pretty good for somebody my age, i suppose. but it sure doesn't fucking feel like this shit is worth that. and having a steady income makes it harder to want to quit.

sometimes i wish i'd just shut my fucking mouth. i bottle up too much shit, and the time i let some slip, it's a bleeding mess. this should teach me a lesson.