mr_maxiebond

what a cunt of a fucking day!!! I dont think i could be any more pissed n upset with my self.Another couple a months of heart break self doubt ahead.i did so fucking well to get through the last 2months n strive forward n work my shit out n make vital changes for some one else becuase they danm well disserved it but it was not seen and was to lil to late.im glad i can at least take those changes as good things for my self but one of the major things keeping me going was to show what id done n have the love of my life look at me like she did when we met.the only thing i want in the world is the respect n love of that girl n i dont think ill ever get.the only love i can literally say i have put blood sweat n tears in to.i wish i could start all over again n fix all the stupid childish decisions i made.i cant belive i had something so wonderfull n i just let it fade away when i could have avoided it all n do things right.i really dont blame her for not wanting to give me another chance for fear of herting all over again,i dont think ill stop herting for many years about losing her n knowing it all came down to me.i really hope she finds happiness can one day forgive me for the pain i put her through.....if you have read this i deleted your testimonial cuz its not fitting n i dont think i deserve much at all