well, i clung to my ex when he first wanted a divorce. i wanted to work it out and started going to counselling. he refused to get counselling too. i knew it was over then. i was trying to make things better and he had no interest in that. i actually started looking at and flirting with men......and i NEVER did that during marriage before. i started trying to live my life without him, yet still having him near. it made me really dislike him. i mean, he CHEATED on me with a skank from SG while i was giving him a weekend to decide if he wanted to work on our relationship before i went to counselling. i found out and was devastated. it took me a long time to get over that hurt.....and longer to realize that i didnt need him in my life. i cried so much and got seriously ill and anemic. i was critical by the time they diagnosed it and needed hospitalization. i had to rebuild my body and my life from the ground up. sad as this sounds, i am glad for my life. i am fighting cancer, but i am SO glad that he is no longer in my life.