To Be Free is To Be Alone.
To Be Free is To Be Alone.
To Be Free is To Be Alone.
mantra to keep reminding myself.
It would seem that some sort of mass compulsion is taking place. Everyone around me has been experiencing what I feel is some sort of phenomenon. I truly wonder if these are final days to a major chapter in not only my life but many of us experiencing existence on mudball, planet Earth. All around the signs are there. There seems to be two distinct characteristics manifesting themselves into the personalities and lives of so many. The one, a complete lot of thought which presses the individual to further individualize themselves. Either your a me person and the others around you are all me people, or maybe it's all just about you and you have no one there to break. And the others seem to be aware of this push for 'me'. They understand the need for 'me' but are nonetheless offering an open line of communication to those that would cut themselves out of our fields; to offer an opportunity to reach out.
I've heard depictions and descriptions of the US and how individualism has run rampant and out of control; to the point at which where to be an individual and the drive to further develop that, individualism is actually undermining our community and society (in the most non-political sense of the terms). when people so reject everything about our world and fight against things in their own lives that may actually have positive value; when individualism supercedes all other things, it becomes selfism. It less serves as a tool to elevate a consciousness and more of a crutch to lean upon.
I'm not sure if I believe that or not, but right now, those around me who have meant much more than anyone for quite sometime only see one thing, themselves. And the fear, it's beginning to pump into my veins with every cut.
To me that's just what those fucking bastards sitting up in their billion dollar estates behind skulls and bones, planning the cataclysmic collapse of what little control we have left over own lives want. And they get it. We are becoming shards of glass, fragmenting and disassociating from eachother, only to know another in passing and unwilling to dive into eachothers rapture, for fear, fear of losing one's self; not to the man, not the gubment, just afraid of losing ourselves to one another....brilliant I say.
I am certainly not a commune of charity and gift, nor am I completely aware and concerned about my effect on others' lives, but I always have to wonder how what I do will effect at the very least those who are most important around me. Now it seems as though that has come around to kick me square in the nuts. I am really trying hard not to become a completely jaded fuck right now, throw in the towel and do it all for me. But really there doesn't seem to be
any
one
else
left.
I know the others will leave eventually or I will leave them.
I also know it's a special thing to have and a treasure to be able to believe when all the rest fall away there would still be you and I. So idealistic of me, it's classic right out of my dreamy little dream, a longing for home.
I guess I can't blame anyone. Go, be happy. If you are in so much denile of your effect on me that you will continue to bring the pain, then go, be happy. If you feel that you can have a better life without me in it, then go, be happy. If you can not co-exist with me then go, be happy. There's nothing I can do about it, at least nothing I've tried.
Maybe someday someone and I can appreciate eachothers worlds enough to vest our efforts and energies towards the fucking same goddamn common goals that anyone and all off us sorry sons of bitches want, just to be fucking happy.
Maybe together that's just too difficult or too trying or too challenging.
But it never had been easier for me than with you.
Maybe I'm just a fool.
To Be Free is To Be Alone.
To Be Free is To Be Alone.
mantra to keep reminding myself.
It would seem that some sort of mass compulsion is taking place. Everyone around me has been experiencing what I feel is some sort of phenomenon. I truly wonder if these are final days to a major chapter in not only my life but many of us experiencing existence on mudball, planet Earth. All around the signs are there. There seems to be two distinct characteristics manifesting themselves into the personalities and lives of so many. The one, a complete lot of thought which presses the individual to further individualize themselves. Either your a me person and the others around you are all me people, or maybe it's all just about you and you have no one there to break. And the others seem to be aware of this push for 'me'. They understand the need for 'me' but are nonetheless offering an open line of communication to those that would cut themselves out of our fields; to offer an opportunity to reach out.
I've heard depictions and descriptions of the US and how individualism has run rampant and out of control; to the point at which where to be an individual and the drive to further develop that, individualism is actually undermining our community and society (in the most non-political sense of the terms). when people so reject everything about our world and fight against things in their own lives that may actually have positive value; when individualism supercedes all other things, it becomes selfism. It less serves as a tool to elevate a consciousness and more of a crutch to lean upon.
I'm not sure if I believe that or not, but right now, those around me who have meant much more than anyone for quite sometime only see one thing, themselves. And the fear, it's beginning to pump into my veins with every cut.
To me that's just what those fucking bastards sitting up in their billion dollar estates behind skulls and bones, planning the cataclysmic collapse of what little control we have left over own lives want. And they get it. We are becoming shards of glass, fragmenting and disassociating from eachother, only to know another in passing and unwilling to dive into eachothers rapture, for fear, fear of losing one's self; not to the man, not the gubment, just afraid of losing ourselves to one another....brilliant I say.
I am certainly not a commune of charity and gift, nor am I completely aware and concerned about my effect on others' lives, but I always have to wonder how what I do will effect at the very least those who are most important around me. Now it seems as though that has come around to kick me square in the nuts. I am really trying hard not to become a completely jaded fuck right now, throw in the towel and do it all for me. But really there doesn't seem to be
any
one
else
left.
I know the others will leave eventually or I will leave them.
I also know it's a special thing to have and a treasure to be able to believe when all the rest fall away there would still be you and I. So idealistic of me, it's classic right out of my dreamy little dream, a longing for home.
I guess I can't blame anyone. Go, be happy. If you are in so much denile of your effect on me that you will continue to bring the pain, then go, be happy. If you feel that you can have a better life without me in it, then go, be happy. If you can not co-exist with me then go, be happy. There's nothing I can do about it, at least nothing I've tried.
Maybe someday someone and I can appreciate eachothers worlds enough to vest our efforts and energies towards the fucking same goddamn common goals that anyone and all off us sorry sons of bitches want, just to be fucking happy.
Maybe together that's just too difficult or too trying or too challenging.
But it never had been easier for me than with you.
Maybe I'm just a fool.