Reality check. She's 17. She might be mature and smart and wonderful. BUt she lives in a gossipy little world of highschool studends. SOme of which I considered my friends. Yet they seem to have the idea that they can trash talk behind their friends backs and keep them as friends. Or get offo n osme sadistic pleasure out of knowing I think they're my friends... God damnit I hate kids. I always have, even when I was their age. I hate them.
I don't know what's going to happen with Susi and I. I'd like to tell her not to care about what anybody thinks and just live her life. But I shouldn't. She needs to have her youth. Whatever still reamins of it and I don't know if I can be part of it this way.
Maybe I'll talk to my mom about it. I don't know. I don't want christmas to be all lousy and dreary because once again the beacon of hope I had for being with somone is already fading.
I mean c'mon, duh Dave. She's 17.
So much rage... I thought relationships were supposed to get harder later on. not right away... Not before it really gets off the ground....
Just pissed... Needed to rant... I need to keep fewer 17 year olds in my company... Maybe I'll have a morep osative update in a day or two.. Some nice things happened today. I was actually kinda happy... Was.
I don't know what's going to happen with Susi and I. I'd like to tell her not to care about what anybody thinks and just live her life. But I shouldn't. She needs to have her youth. Whatever still reamins of it and I don't know if I can be part of it this way.
Maybe I'll talk to my mom about it. I don't know. I don't want christmas to be all lousy and dreary because once again the beacon of hope I had for being with somone is already fading.
I mean c'mon, duh Dave. She's 17.
So much rage... I thought relationships were supposed to get harder later on. not right away... Not before it really gets off the ground....
Just pissed... Needed to rant... I need to keep fewer 17 year olds in my company... Maybe I'll have a morep osative update in a day or two.. Some nice things happened today. I was actually kinda happy... Was.
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bye for now
~MaryAnne
ps happy holidays hun...