mooj

I just spent the last half hour trying to fit my fist in my mouth


the things boredom will do to you


my jaw is now slightly on the bruised side, as is my leg (tattoo finito!) but it's all in the name of good wholesome fun

my old flatmate Gillianjust sent me about five articles about healthy eating and exercise, me thinks she may be trying to tell me something

a lovely picture for you from the bareback cowboy night at sleazy cheezy



choicy


My sister sister phoned me last night to tell me she bought me a souvenir from Morocco but it broke

"eh, when were you in Morocco? I thought you were in Glasgow?"

"Jenny I've been backpacking in Morocco for the last 3 months you dipshit"

"oh"

does somebody have a spare clue they could lend me?

I have given up binge drinking and it's not even because of the stupid stuff I do whilst drunk (see below)

1. Stupidest thing you've tried to steal whilst drunk?
- a hoover

2. Maximum number of times you've past out in one drinking session?
- Seven

3. Number of times you've drunkenly thrown up in front of a parental unit?
-5

4. Weirdest situation you've woken up in?
-On a mattress, in the opposite end of the city from where I was supposed to be with only 1 shoe and remnants of a western saloon girl costume, and needing to be at work in 20 minutes

5. What is the stupidest thing you have ever done whilst drunk?
-Half a terms course work, them handed it in without checking it in the sober light of day, (seemed like a good idea at the time)
-among other things which are too obscene to be mentioned ...EVER AGAIN!

love from the blondest girl in the world