Hey there. Maybe I'll be seeing you soon because I'm moving to Atlanta in less than a week...
But I've been where you've been and know how much it hurts....physically, mentally, spiritually. With me it was kind of like someone tossed a sheet of darkness over my head and never let me peek beneath it. But everyone needs to come out of the darkness sometime. Things will click in your head. And get better. But it takes time, determination, and a lot of hard work. Digging deep inside to places you never knew existed and bringing all the shit out in the open. But most of all, you need hope.
What makes life bearable? Breathing the air on a crisp day. Going for a drive by yourself, windows down, music blaring. A slight smile from someone on the subway where typically no one would even dare to make eye contact with you. Knowing someone gives a shit, even if it's your fucking dog. Or the 90 year old man who looks forward to your visit every week at his nursing home. I've realized though that only you can make life bearable for yourself. Now, though, not only is it bearable; it's beautiful.
Life is a gift....and while it may be wrapped up in silk and tafetta or a brown paper bag, it's really what you make it. You may just have to struggle more for it.
Hope shit gets better and hang in there. I send you a message when I get down to ATL.
But I've been where you've been and know how much it hurts....physically, mentally, spiritually. With me it was kind of like someone tossed a sheet of darkness over my head and never let me peek beneath it. But everyone needs to come out of the darkness sometime. Things will click in your head. And get better. But it takes time, determination, and a lot of hard work. Digging deep inside to places you never knew existed and bringing all the shit out in the open. But most of all, you need hope.
What makes life bearable? Breathing the air on a crisp day. Going for a drive by yourself, windows down, music blaring. A slight smile from someone on the subway where typically no one would even dare to make eye contact with you. Knowing someone gives a shit, even if it's your fucking dog. Or the 90 year old man who looks forward to your visit every week at his nursing home. I've realized though that only you can make life bearable for yourself. Now, though, not only is it bearable; it's beautiful.
Life is a gift....and while it may be wrapped up in silk and tafetta or a brown paper bag, it's really what you make it. You may just have to struggle more for it.
Hope shit gets better and hang in there. I send you a message when I get down to ATL.