monkeynuts

Hey all i am here once again. suprised? didn't think so. well my life is falling apart and being put back together all at the same time. i do not know which is happening faster or which will eventualy take over. i have my hope and i have my gut feelings. in the end though as long as i am alive and i have the ones i love next to me i will all ways be on top. so what i am saying, i guess, is i think i will be fine. i hope. i've got alot going for me right now and even more to loose. i can't keep being a fuck up. i have to try harder. apply my self. do what is right. and above all get my head back in the game. if this does not happen soon i will be going through more life changes than i had planned for. but i feel i will be on top. on top because those i love will be there, as they have said and promised. i am losing friends, lovers, family, keeping some old ones and gaining new ones. it is rough time but as always i will be fine. with those i love by my side i am invincible, for as long as i have them there is no losing. and i am again on top.