All right, kiddies. I suppose I should fill you in on what I've been up to this past year or so. So here it is, in semi-chronological order.
- My lovely wife and I finally escaped the blistering shithole that is Southern California. We moved to the greater Portland area (okay, Vancouver) and don't regret it at all, no matter what she tells you. Honestly, if I could wall off southern California and set it on fire until it sank into the Pacific, I would do it without a moment's hesitation.
- I got a new job, working as an actual network administrator here in town. It's stressful, it's challenging, and it's probably the most rewarded I've ever felt working- like I'm an actual grownup with a career and shit. I had to take out my earrings, but hey- no matter what Johnny Truant at your local Hot Topic Piercing Parlor will tell you, it's just bits of metal.
- I am also now a Microsoft Certified Professional. Probably not a big deal to you, but it was a pretty major milestone for me, considering I had to basically memorize an 800-page book about Windows XP. So if you think getting a Microsoft certification is easy, go fuck yourself.
- I turned thirty a couple of months ago. No one really seemed to give a shit, so neither did I. Unravled did make me the best goddamn fried chicken I think I've ever had, though.
- I've had a fucking blast and a half exploring my new environs. I remember way back when thinking how much fun this town was, and now I'm almost there. Not to mention hanging with some fucking quality people as well.
- We no longer have creepy oldmanroommate! I swear to god, he smelled so fucking bad, I started accusing him of dipping everything he ate into his own asshole before consuming it. With any luck, he's bagging groceries in the wilds of Colorado and getting bukkake'd on by cowboys on Thursday nights. Hey, it's Thursday night right now!
- As a "coming home" present, my parents bought me a car. It's a 1986 Volvo station wagon, it's remarkably well-maintained for being that old, and I fucking love it. It feels good to be mobile again after (voluntarily) being a pedestrian for the last five years or so.
- I must have been a really good boy this year, because unravled bought me an XBox 360 for Christmas. I then proceeded to pick up Rock Band, and have been showing the world what a mediocre singer and horrible, horrible drummer I truly am. For those of you who give a tin shit, my XBox gamertag is "DrinkinPants".
Which brings us to the beginning of 2008. I'm once again safely ensconced in the wet, serial-killer and meth-infested arms of my loving Pacific Northwest. My wife is surviving her first winter here (mostly by complaining and stealing all my socks). We have a six-month old cat that I'm pretty sure is evil concentrate. Things are relatively well.
So why did I come back?
Two reasons. One, atomicant said he'd buy me a gift membership if I came back and brought the hammer down on all the idiots around here lately. And two, I missed just talking about shit like this. I tried Facebook, and gave up on Myspace- this is where I'd rather be. This is where I can just talk about whatever's on my mind.
Plus, y'know, I like titties.
- My lovely wife and I finally escaped the blistering shithole that is Southern California. We moved to the greater Portland area (okay, Vancouver) and don't regret it at all, no matter what she tells you. Honestly, if I could wall off southern California and set it on fire until it sank into the Pacific, I would do it without a moment's hesitation.
- I got a new job, working as an actual network administrator here in town. It's stressful, it's challenging, and it's probably the most rewarded I've ever felt working- like I'm an actual grownup with a career and shit. I had to take out my earrings, but hey- no matter what Johnny Truant at your local Hot Topic Piercing Parlor will tell you, it's just bits of metal.
- I am also now a Microsoft Certified Professional. Probably not a big deal to you, but it was a pretty major milestone for me, considering I had to basically memorize an 800-page book about Windows XP. So if you think getting a Microsoft certification is easy, go fuck yourself.
- I turned thirty a couple of months ago. No one really seemed to give a shit, so neither did I. Unravled did make me the best goddamn fried chicken I think I've ever had, though.
- I've had a fucking blast and a half exploring my new environs. I remember way back when thinking how much fun this town was, and now I'm almost there. Not to mention hanging with some fucking quality people as well.
- We no longer have creepy oldmanroommate! I swear to god, he smelled so fucking bad, I started accusing him of dipping everything he ate into his own asshole before consuming it. With any luck, he's bagging groceries in the wilds of Colorado and getting bukkake'd on by cowboys on Thursday nights. Hey, it's Thursday night right now!
- As a "coming home" present, my parents bought me a car. It's a 1986 Volvo station wagon, it's remarkably well-maintained for being that old, and I fucking love it. It feels good to be mobile again after (voluntarily) being a pedestrian for the last five years or so.
- I must have been a really good boy this year, because unravled bought me an XBox 360 for Christmas. I then proceeded to pick up Rock Band, and have been showing the world what a mediocre singer and horrible, horrible drummer I truly am. For those of you who give a tin shit, my XBox gamertag is "DrinkinPants".
Which brings us to the beginning of 2008. I'm once again safely ensconced in the wet, serial-killer and meth-infested arms of my loving Pacific Northwest. My wife is surviving her first winter here (mostly by complaining and stealing all my socks). We have a six-month old cat that I'm pretty sure is evil concentrate. Things are relatively well.
So why did I come back?
Two reasons. One, atomicant said he'd buy me a gift membership if I came back and brought the hammer down on all the idiots around here lately. And two, I missed just talking about shit like this. I tried Facebook, and gave up on Myspace- this is where I'd rather be. This is where I can just talk about whatever's on my mind.
Plus, y'know, I like titties.
VIEW 25 of 39 COMMENTS
atomicant:
coffee's still brewing...
atomicant:
i shit a mcrib.