missymalice

Old poem i wrote about six months after my buddy evan died. I miss that boy.

I remember the pale gray puddles
That shivered on the pavement-
The way the world seemed half asleep
The day I knew you were gone.

Your name conjures the word suicide
Like a curse,
And the metallic tang of pain
Fills the space you left behind.

Empty condolences buzz in the air-
Sugar plum wishes
That fall flat in the face of death,
Like torn-out pages of bedtime stories.

I see your brothers' bloodshot eyes.
Your favorite shirt hangs limply
Across your mother's slumped shoulders,
As disfiguring as any scar.

You are the silence that hangs
Sickeningly suspended in the air-
An absence felt forever,
An unspoken "I love you,"

Defined by regrets and unpaid debts.
You were my savior and friend.
Forever my source of strength,
And, now, forever sixteen.