You know what one of the greatest feelings in the world is? The absence of pain. And I'm not talking about everyday, feeling-good-about-things, I'm talking that moment (and subsequent moments) after suffering intense, horrible physical pain and realizing that it's no longer there.
I won't go into all the gritty details - suffice to say that I spent most of last night in the Emergency Room with a horrifically painful infected cyst. With some draining and some antibiotics, I'm much better just 24 hours later, but dear god, it was awful.
It also made me realize that, for all my posturing (both to myself and others) that I'm completely independent and can deal with everything and anything on my own, sometimes...I just need to give in and be a baby. I had four people offer to come spend long, late hours sitting around the ER with me last night - both my parents, and two of the best friends anyone could have in the world were willing to be with me. But no, I insisted that I was really fine, that I could do it myself, that I didn't want to bother anyone. Of course, after about 3 hours in the midst of sick, bored people, while doubled over in pain (so much so that I couldn't even concentrate on the new Harry Potter), I started weeping. Just like that. In the middle of the ER waiting room. I wanted someone to be there with me, and by my own insistence, no one was.
I finally saw a doctor after almost 5 hours. He gave me some drugs and a tetanus shot and sent me home with the instructions to just wait it out. And sure enough, after one dose of simple antibiotics, the pain was pretty much gone. So that's good. I just wish I had let myself be taken care of for once. Because there's really nothing sadder than a girl, dressed in "business casual" attire, sobbing to herself in the corner of an emergency room for a couple of hours.
I won't go into all the gritty details - suffice to say that I spent most of last night in the Emergency Room with a horrifically painful infected cyst. With some draining and some antibiotics, I'm much better just 24 hours later, but dear god, it was awful.
It also made me realize that, for all my posturing (both to myself and others) that I'm completely independent and can deal with everything and anything on my own, sometimes...I just need to give in and be a baby. I had four people offer to come spend long, late hours sitting around the ER with me last night - both my parents, and two of the best friends anyone could have in the world were willing to be with me. But no, I insisted that I was really fine, that I could do it myself, that I didn't want to bother anyone. Of course, after about 3 hours in the midst of sick, bored people, while doubled over in pain (so much so that I couldn't even concentrate on the new Harry Potter), I started weeping. Just like that. In the middle of the ER waiting room. I wanted someone to be there with me, and by my own insistence, no one was.
I finally saw a doctor after almost 5 hours. He gave me some drugs and a tetanus shot and sent me home with the instructions to just wait it out. And sure enough, after one dose of simple antibiotics, the pain was pretty much gone. So that's good. I just wish I had let myself be taken care of for once. Because there's really nothing sadder than a girl, dressed in "business casual" attire, sobbing to herself in the corner of an emergency room for a couple of hours.
VIEW 23 of 23 COMMENTS
7deuce:
sometimes it's hard to let people help you. i know i have built a wall and won't let in anyone though i wish i would. glad you are feeling better.
7deuce:
i was wondering if you still wanted to catch a game at hooters? my schedual is going to clear up a lot after this week. or at least until school starts in september. so if it is something you still want to do cool. if not i understand.