misstyrios

I have been riding the Boston T since I was a small child, and have been riding it largely alone since I have been a teenager. Not until last night have I ever felt uncomfotable or threatened. I left the SGBoston dinner (happy birthday, Sid!), which was great fun, but I couldn't go clubbing with everyone due to transportation issues. So I went down to wait for the train to take me back to my car - I live within walking distance of one train line, but it's often easier to drive to another line, which is faster and allows me to avoid walking down dark streets alone and in tall shoes. I was waiting for this particular train when a man - who was clearly mentally disabled, though mildly - approached me and told me he liked my boots. He kept telling me that I looked like I belonged in a "girl rock and roll group." He was making me a little uncomfortable, but the train came quickly. I walked down to the door furthest away from where I had been standing, but he followed me. I tried to get into an area of the car that was fairly crowded, but he followed me there too. He kept asking me questions - what my name was, how old I was (first, he actually asked if I was in high school), what music I liked, etc. I was exceedingly uncomfortable, and kept trying to inch away, never looking at him. The train was rather full, and he was the only one talking - and he was very loud. But, in the true spirit of public transportation, no one said anything. I tried to move, but he would follow me, and kept asking me questions. I looked away, I igorned him, but he persisted. Finally, a couple got up from their seats and came over to me, offering to get off at the next stop with me and wait for the next train there with me. I was grateful to know that someone acknowledged what everyone saw was happening, but I declined their offer. As my stop approached, the train had emptied out a lot and I got even more nervous - the stop I get off at is very isolated and not many people get off there. It sits in the middle of a residential neighborhood, so it wasn't like I could just walk off somewhere to feel safe. Even though he had stopped talking to me, I was so afraid that he would follow me. So I got my keys and phone out of my purse, but never made it clear exactly when I was getting ready to get off the train. When my stop arrived, I waited a second, and then hurried off as fast as I could, hoping the doors would close before he realized I had gotten off. And I was lucky. From the corner of my eye, I saw him start towards the door after I got off, but not before the doors closed and the train started. It was so disconcerting - never, not in my years of living in the Boston area, or my four years in NYC, have I ever felt like I might be in danger. And I'm not sure I handled it that well - what if he had gotten out with me, where there was no one else, where the only place I could have gone was my car? He probably had the mental capacity of a much younger person, but he was big, and could have easily overpowered me. Should I have said something to the conductor? Should I have gotten off where I knew there were more people and I could have gotten help if needed? I have been such an independent city girl for so long, yet I think I need to prepare myself better for times like that.