My anxiety is running rampant. My brother in law and sister in law are 2 of the most self serving people I know. My husband and I are counted as below them.
My fil was an educator and retired the year I had my son. When my sil and I went back to work he asked if he could watch the kids. This is amazing my son gets to play every day with his cousin and his grandfather. They don't charge us either. My bil and sil have always told my fil that he works for them while they are working and him and my mil must follow their rules. They have always seemed to take advantage of this set up, leaving their daughter with my mil and fil at least 2 over nights a week as well. My niece started biting my son before her first birthday and it has changed from biting to scratching. My mom said today that she hadn't seen my son without claw marks. I know my fil disciplines her but there is a bigger issue at hand. When we tried to bring this up with the sil and bil they used it as ammunition to remove my niece from my fil care. Funny thing is she's still over multiple nights a week.
Tuesday was a bad day for my son. Again he came home hurt. We went over for dinner at my mil and fil house Wednesday night. My bil was unexpectedly there and was being somewhat a bully to. My son (nit picking him over every thing.)
It started with my son taking a toy away from my niece. We made him give it back and apologize (again he's 2 and sharing is something we're working on) he went off to play with something else and my niece followed. My mil told her that my son was playing with it. My son went around the corner and she followed and went to lunge at him and I forcefully said her name and told her no.
Then all hell broke loose. My bil left. Let his toddler alone in the car and started yelling at me. How dare I talk to his daughter that way and basically verbally assaulted me and my son. I did yell back, not really even sure what but he was told to leave. He then came back to the house. Violently pushing the locked door until he got in. I grabbed my son and ran down stairs. He was then removed from the house by his fil.
His wife dropped off an Easter gift for my son so I thought I would be polite and thank her, but that turned into a shit show too.
I felt that had my husband not gotten in from the of me that my bil may have done me physical harm. People are trying to tell me that is not the case but when people have violent outbursts like that its usually because of a bigger issue. I'll post the conversation between my solar and I tell me what you think. I really feel like she thinks it is OK that her husband verbally assaulted me in front of my toddler.
Further more, the last time someone was that aggressive towards me it was an ex who tried to smother me 2x.
Thank you for G's Easter gift. We'll leave A's with milk and fil
I appreciate the thank you as well as I appreciate the thank you as well as the gift you have for A. I had bought those things before everything blew up on Wednesday and we both thought G still deserved to get them.
As for what happened that night, I understand a lot transpired and I imagine there are a lot of expectations for apologies from everyone involved. However, I'm only interested in one, and that's the apology you owe my daughter. From all accounts, it is clear that the way you yelled at her was completely out of line. The result of your actions is that I have had to spend the last two days reassuring a toddler that, no she is not a bad child, no she didn't hit or hurt anyone, and no Aunty shouldn't have yelled. The apology she is owed should not be contingent on anyone else receiving an apology and she should not have to wait for everyone else's tempers to subside.
With this being said, until you are willing to apologize to her I would prefer you not contact me again.
I'll apologize to A as tone was harsh as I was worried about G. but I will not be able to be in bil company for some time. I don't think you understand the savarity of what he did.
It's not surprising that you don't want to be around him and the feeling is mutual. However, bil does feel he owes G an apology for the things he said about him. If that can happen I think it would be beneficial.
Im sorry but it will be some time before that can happen. Bil's response was overly aggressive. I ask that Dave is not around G.
Just to be clear, bil was verbally aggressive towards you (not G) after you decided to yell at his child, and thats the consensus between mil and fil. But if you have decided that it's best to keep yourself and Gerry away from him that's your perogative and that's fine.
Clearly we are at an impasse.
Not at all. But I won't sit back and let you imply that my husband would harm Gerry in any way because it's simply not true.