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misssmartypants

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Member Since 2006

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Monday Mar 19, 2007

Mar 19, 2007
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I think an email to a friend dictates most of what I'm doing lately. An extremely different path than I ever thought I would be taking, but here I am!

In the new year I have found myself transforming a lot of ideas I had. I find myself an idealistic person. Things will always happen a certain way, and if they do not, then it's not the right thing for me. This year has definitely shown me that my idealistic way isn't always the right way. God has some funky things he wants us to experience and I have to realize it's not inside this perfect box I have created.

Crossing my mind recently is a lot of heart felt questions. Do I really want to ever get married or have kids? Am I in the right profession? Where should I be going from here?

God is showing me a child's heart hidden under all the hurt and bitterness. He is showing me there isn't a black and white but a purple, green, red, and yellow all mixed up. I'm learning to unbury my heart and experience life as it is happening. The present is the only time we can really enjoy life, not thinking about the past or future. It's not easy.

Overall I am doing well, nothing really too new is sprouting. I'm still working, still breathing, still paying bills. smile I am trying to set my love life straight, and all the sharp corners keep cutting me. It's something I've needed to do for a long time. I hate being an adult. haha.

"Let the one who seeks not stop seeking until he finds. When he finds, he shall be troubled. When he becomes troubled, he will be amazed, and shall come to transcend all things."

kiss kiss
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
lovechild:
aww biggrin
Mar 20, 2007
jay_blank:
It's great that you're taking the time to sort through this and feel. Life rarely turns out the way we plan it, but usually has some great surprises that you couldn't have imagined. For instance, you meeting me. You didn't plan it, but it's been one of the best things to happen to you wink


NOTE: To other readers: I'm not really that conceited. Smartypants and I have a unique relationship involving crap talking and wet nose snuggles.
Mar 21, 2007

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