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misssmartypants

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Member Since 2006

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Tuesday Nov 07, 2006

Nov 7, 2006
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Forewarned: This is a pathetic blog for myself.

Still sick. Still hating it. UGGHHHHHH.

I think I hate it most because I'm completely alone. I can stand being alone for about a day and a half, after that, I'm ready for some kind of interaction. It makes me sad that I don't have anyone who would come see me. I called a few people to see if they would bring me cigarettes, and every single one said they were "busy". Busy being watching TV or hanging out with some people. If I weren't sick I wouldn't blame anyone for saying that. I just wanted a little attention!!!

It really sucks when I think about relationships. I don't want to be alone anymore. It's nice for a while, it's lost it's freshness. I know guys think I'm attractive. I've been told that plenty of times, so I'm not worried about that. I guess what worries me is so many guys seem intimidated by a girl who knows what she wants. I move to my own beat and I've never been a follower. After they find this out, they are gone. I thought with qualities like that it would be liked more than less. I haven't found one who has loved it yet, haha.

What makes it worse is so many people say "Oh my gosh, why aren't you dating?" Yeah THAT doesn't make me feel like a freak. I don't know why I'm not dating, no one asks me out, and the few I've been interested in aren't on that vibe. I'm just jealous for those it's easy for. Why is it so hard for me? I feel normal, I've been told I'm a great person, but here I am!

I don't know why I'm typing this on this site, I guess it's the only place I have a real blog. Also, no one knows me, so I don't care if I'm pathetic.

The positives of today are I caught up on my Lost. I haven't seen the last 4 episodes. It's so intense, and so many hot bodies.





bok
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
kingskottie:
i really wish you felt better.

i'm drinking beer tonight at home... the wife is out and about.... not answering her cell...whatever,,, it's cool... i'm listening to my itunes on shuffle.

bored.

i'm sorry yr sick.... but hey... yr 22.... you'll be ok. hee hee. kiss
Nov 8, 2006
kingskottie:
you know... i'm filling up yr journal... heh... i delete doubles ... i try to keep up with who's posted.... yr roomie? dude? chick? hot? drinking? beer?
Nov 8, 2006

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