missred

im cool with the ex now i guess. hes the only one that makes me cave. i wasnt mad about the whole him sleeping with someone thing, we arent together so fuck away. what did piss me off was if your gonna volenteer the info, dont lie. wtf? does that make sense or am i the dumb one here? this is for real his last chance. its here in "writing". this time i wont cave bc he has worn me down so much that i wont be able to take him back as anything. i put all the shit he gave me in a bin so i dont have to see it anymore. i dont want to trash it bc it was a big part of my life and im one of those freaks who keeps everything that ever ment anything. i also like to document my life so i never forget anything good. anyway...the current relationship im dealing with...im digging myself a hole i think. im not sure tho. i dont want to be his gf and i have told him that and been up front from the start so he knows. hes someone fun to hang out with bc we have alot in common as far as hobbies. i dont know many people around here so i feel kinda stuck. like i dont know if i like like him or i like hanging out with him bc we have fun racing cars or going out on the bikes. i know part of it is bc im lonely since breaking up with my ex. i want to go back to being with girls but there arent any here!!!! wtf ladies!!!?

i have nothing intresting to say. my thoughts are kinda wondering right now. i cant sleep. hope i dont lose my job bc my boss is a dweeb and calls me out on shit that other ppl are doing. im looking for a new one but want to wait til i get all my new gear before i leave. also want a new job first. no place is hiring. my tongue feels so strange, i took out the barbell bc it was hurting. i dont remember what its like with out it. anytime i take out any of my piercings it looks and feels so wierd. its like they are part of my body now and i dont feel like me,whole, with out them. im looking to get some more soon. ink too.

to those of you who read these and comment me, thanks for the smiles and laughs you give me. it makes my night. =] xoxo

ima try to sleep.
i got new bed dressings, sheets or whatever you want to call them. they are made out of jersey and are so amazing! plus they are my favorite color, GREY! so soft, warm, grey and super comfy = amazing and lovely time in bed. sleeping that is =p
good night or should i say morning since its 2 am...
<3