DISCLAIMER!!! below you will not find anything amusing nor profound.... if you here for the Ha ha's.... DO NOT READ ANYMORE!!!!!
ok. i may have drank entirely too much, i may be feeling entirely too sorry for myself, I MAY BE EXPERIENCING some kind of psycotic breakdown seriously.
i had this fucked up thing happen to me tonight. i freaked out during an Ashton Kushner movie. shut up i am totallly serious (much to my dismay) have you guys seen the butterfly effect? i wish i could bad mouth it, but for some reason...rum maybe??? it really upset me. now in my reality based consious mind i realize just how ridiculus this sounds. i can rationilize it by oh, jeez Lar ! you were already upset today, lots of external factors are stressing you out and rightly so. (i.e. i have to retake classes at school i already have credits for and then some at other colleges, finacial FUCK YOU AID is fucking me AGAIN my love life is shit because honeastly i am too muchof a fucked up peson to have a mature loving relationship with ANYONE yes even YOU mother fucker- doesn't that make you happy?) i had this memory from preschool. insane? most likely. but in my memory(??????) there was some pretty fucked up shit going on. it was bad. I believe child abuse bad. yes i realize this is awefullly personal to talk about, but since my fucking therapist is "dumping" me because she has "unfortunatly" developed some kind of un"professional" attachment to me... i have NOONE else to rant and rave too.so thank you very much and fuck you very much. i think i amlosing my fucking my mind!!!! i made a mistake. my fucking dad killed my mom... i had a baby... . and now i am going fucking crazy! there is this nasty nasty fucking voice in my head saying...yes baby! you are fucked. get over it! i want to... i really honestly do... but i just can't everytime that i have a fairly decent run of "pretending" that the lesser shit in my life is more important then the fucking important BULLSHIT i am denying to everyone and myself...something fucking happens that makes me insane. in this case it was Ashton- fucking -Kushner. your movie sucked. it was disgusting. pervert. there i bad mouthed it after all... do i feel better? NO. i feel like crap... thankd for fucking noticing.
MY deep MEANINGFUL advice...... STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! THERE IS SOMETHING SERIOUSLY WRONG IN MY BRAIN. ashton mother fucking kushner. bastid.
ok. i may have drank entirely too much, i may be feeling entirely too sorry for myself, I MAY BE EXPERIENCING some kind of psycotic breakdown seriously.
i had this fucked up thing happen to me tonight. i freaked out during an Ashton Kushner movie. shut up i am totallly serious (much to my dismay) have you guys seen the butterfly effect? i wish i could bad mouth it, but for some reason...rum maybe??? it really upset me. now in my reality based consious mind i realize just how ridiculus this sounds. i can rationilize it by oh, jeez Lar ! you were already upset today, lots of external factors are stressing you out and rightly so. (i.e. i have to retake classes at school i already have credits for and then some at other colleges, finacial FUCK YOU AID is fucking me AGAIN my love life is shit because honeastly i am too muchof a fucked up peson to have a mature loving relationship with ANYONE yes even YOU mother fucker- doesn't that make you happy?) i had this memory from preschool. insane? most likely. but in my memory(??????) there was some pretty fucked up shit going on. it was bad. I believe child abuse bad. yes i realize this is awefullly personal to talk about, but since my fucking therapist is "dumping" me because she has "unfortunatly" developed some kind of un"professional" attachment to me... i have NOONE else to rant and rave too.so thank you very much and fuck you very much. i think i amlosing my fucking my mind!!!! i made a mistake. my fucking dad killed my mom... i had a baby... . and now i am going fucking crazy! there is this nasty nasty fucking voice in my head saying...yes baby! you are fucked. get over it! i want to... i really honestly do... but i just can't everytime that i have a fairly decent run of "pretending" that the lesser shit in my life is more important then the fucking important BULLSHIT i am denying to everyone and myself...something fucking happens that makes me insane. in this case it was Ashton- fucking -Kushner. your movie sucked. it was disgusting. pervert. there i bad mouthed it after all... do i feel better? NO. i feel like crap... thankd for fucking noticing.
MY deep MEANINGFUL advice...... STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! THERE IS SOMETHING SERIOUSLY WRONG IN MY BRAIN. ashton mother fucking kushner. bastid.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
What exactly is a normal life anyways? I dont kow too many people who doesnt have some sort of fucked up shit going on or went on in the past. I did see that movie...very high when I watched it but nevertheless I could see how it could bring up bad childhood experiences..But it is okay to vent out , it may not make you feel better but i think your better off then keeping it in..
The only thing I can offer you is an ear & a friendship...Youre not scaring me off that easy
Alcohol does effect us in strange ways..Your entitled to shitty ass days & this was one
I wish I could be there to give you a big hug...Im thinking about you !