I removed a couple people from my friends list...this was b/c I felt it was one-sided. I'm not into collecting a list of names. I want quality not quanity...sorry.
Picture of the Day: This is a picture I took with my brother at a very old graveyard in Mandarin. It was completely void of a date of death or a name....all it said is:
I think that's cool. It doesn't matter who's there. They are "AT REST" and that's all that counts.
~For my own sanity I think it's time for me to start using this journal to talk about deeper parts of my life. I have been secretive b/c I didn't feel like it was anyone's business. With that said....
~I've recently started realizing I am not a very rational thinking person. I don't know if I was born this way or became this way through circumstances. I'm a completely impatient person. I want what I want and I want it now. (H2o would be proud
) More often than not I'm compulsive. It trickles down through everything in my life...from money to relationships. I'm not sure how to make my brain think in more rational ways. I am a very emotional person who always tries to keep everyone happy. (I think this causes alot of my irrationalism.) In the process I often forget about myself. I don't know what makes me happy anymore.
~I am going through a divorce right now. That's right I'm married. I haven't shared this information b/c until now I thought it didn't matter to talk about. I am unhappy and have been for many years. I'm still in the very early stages and I'm scared. I know it's for the best and I want it. I don't really know what it's like to be "on my own." I've had jobs in the past, but not in 5 years. I must find work now and move from the place I'm currently living. This is a huge shock for my system and with me already being such an emotional person it's overwhelming. I'm talking about all this for my own sanity. I'm not looking for sympathy. I just need to talk. I need to find what makes me happy.
~I have a thousand questions I want to ask someone. (He knows who he is.) I think I may have fucked shit up. I seem to do that a lot in my life. I hope he can understand me atleast a little bit. He has made me open my eyes. He compliments me so well. Why do I always sabatoge things?
I don't mean to.
~I hope this wasn't to much for everyone to absorb at once, but I had to get things off my back. I often hide behind a happy attitude, but I'm tired of pretending. Now does everyone still wonder why I don't smile in pictures?
Q:
1. Do you ever fool yourself? In more ways than I like to admit.
2. Is the grass greener on the otherside? Probably so, my grass is all dead.
3. Have you ever listened to a song over and over and not been sick of it? What is the name of that song? I been in a Nirvana mode lately..so I been listening to "Verse Chorus Verse" and also "Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge On Seattle"
4. Post me a pic that would make me smile:
~MiSSing_Girl
P.S. Go say "HI" to my future sis-in-law and SG limbo girl OneDarkFlame!
Picture of the Day: This is a picture I took with my brother at a very old graveyard in Mandarin. It was completely void of a date of death or a name....all it said is:
I think that's cool. It doesn't matter who's there. They are "AT REST" and that's all that counts.
~For my own sanity I think it's time for me to start using this journal to talk about deeper parts of my life. I have been secretive b/c I didn't feel like it was anyone's business. With that said....
~I've recently started realizing I am not a very rational thinking person. I don't know if I was born this way or became this way through circumstances. I'm a completely impatient person. I want what I want and I want it now. (H2o would be proud
) More often than not I'm compulsive. It trickles down through everything in my life...from money to relationships. I'm not sure how to make my brain think in more rational ways. I am a very emotional person who always tries to keep everyone happy. (I think this causes alot of my irrationalism.) In the process I often forget about myself. I don't know what makes me happy anymore.
~I am going through a divorce right now. That's right I'm married. I haven't shared this information b/c until now I thought it didn't matter to talk about. I am unhappy and have been for many years. I'm still in the very early stages and I'm scared. I know it's for the best and I want it. I don't really know what it's like to be "on my own." I've had jobs in the past, but not in 5 years. I must find work now and move from the place I'm currently living. This is a huge shock for my system and with me already being such an emotional person it's overwhelming. I'm talking about all this for my own sanity. I'm not looking for sympathy. I just need to talk. I need to find what makes me happy.
~I have a thousand questions I want to ask someone. (He knows who he is.) I think I may have fucked shit up. I seem to do that a lot in my life. I hope he can understand me atleast a little bit. He has made me open my eyes. He compliments me so well. Why do I always sabatoge things?
I don't mean to.
~I hope this wasn't to much for everyone to absorb at once, but I had to get things off my back. I often hide behind a happy attitude, but I'm tired of pretending. Now does everyone still wonder why I don't smile in pictures?
Q:
1. Do you ever fool yourself? In more ways than I like to admit.
2. Is the grass greener on the otherside? Probably so, my grass is all dead.
3. Have you ever listened to a song over and over and not been sick of it? What is the name of that song? I been in a Nirvana mode lately..so I been listening to "Verse Chorus Verse" and also "Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge On Seattle"
4. Post me a pic that would make me smile:
~MiSSing_Girl
P.S. Go say "HI" to my future sis-in-law and SG limbo girl OneDarkFlame!
VIEW 25 of 63 COMMENTS
cool pic. who just gets "at rest"? i think it's kinda funny in a sad way. like they weren't cool enough to get their name.
im would be cool. where do you want to do it?
my news of the weekend.....
got called in to work on sunday. kinda. a house exploded in my neighborhood. 3 streets over. filled up with natural gas and went boom. i had the dog out in the backyard and saw a giant pillar of smoke. got over there, work called me on the way out the door. i got to see our volunteer fire dept. in action. i'm going to go buy more fire extinguishers for around the house. they were the most horrible thing that i've ever seen.
my dog trapped himself in the bathroom. my door kinda closes on it's own. he went in, got stuck, pannicked and pooped all over the place. not hard poop either. it had to be diahrea. poor guy had it all over the place.
9am, gotta get ready for work.
cary