I don't know what to do today...
Hoping I can get to the gym again. I was there around 7 last night and it was not pretty.. To crowded!!!
Hoping I can get to the gym again. I was there around 7 last night and it was not pretty.. To crowded!!!
I know for certain I like her definately as a friend, and I'm physically attracted to having sex with her.
We are sort of into the same things, music politics.... she's a positive person ( has her career that she loves... cares for people... wants to go places, do things etc. ) Not a train wreck girl or a young unknown still formulating woman - which are the usual types I meet, and fall for....
She says she wants to stay single for a while....As she's just out of a long relationship... me? I'm so used to being a single, work hermit and getting no sex for years... ( seriously this last year has been odd... I've had more sex with three women than I've had with any woman in the past 9 years ) that I'm just enjoying this experience, as it's been the most advertursome sex I've ever had. Which is a new change for me. Way back when I last had sex, I was so used to "Starfish" girls, ( who just lie there and let me do all the work. )
In the past I would jump on this kind of thing and stamp it out. Be the desparate persuit guy. And I think because I'm so casual and smart about it ( we tend to hang out and talk alot... and then talking leads to sex... ) which I've missed for a very long time, that's why it's working... I'm getting some... Woo hoo...!
Is it no strings? I can't say that... every sexual encounter has something that keeps it there....I think she hopes that it becomes something more... that romance and love develop. She tends to sort of persue me, which is an aspect I'm enjoying from an ego point of view as that's never happened to me.
Me? I don't know...every time I've been "super casual" relationships tend to work. Mind you they're never deep and don't last very long. When I make long term, " this is it! " " she's the one " type plans they always eject the relationship, and I get all emotional, deressed, and caught up in wanting her...etc.....
I just don't want that kind of thing ever again. Shit like that made me want to litterly, " jump off a Bridge" many years ago and I swore once I recovered my self esteem, got counseling for all the suicidal thoughts from that soap Opera... I swore to myself, I'd never go there again...ever.
Plus, I know her ex really well ( as much as I knew her before we got togther ) I've gotten him regular concert work and his stuff is still around her place... it's kind of awkward. I still see them as the couple, and me as an interloper.
As to the eyebrows... she's growning them back... grudgingly....I suspect she doesn't like her eyebrows in their natural form, which is sad.
Because I think she deserves that from all the really great, awsome rice king guys... to them, she'd be the pinical girl. Hot, geeky, but with cool Japanese, yakusa tattoos, piercings and into dressing up. Plus having a great career and outlook... She's a total, hot, rice king guys fantasy...If she'd let the right... cool rice king boy into her life. ( which she's not into right now... while she loves Manga comics and SFX T.V. )
See, this is where we depart... Im a theatre geek. A glee cluber. She's the " collect the figurines" kind of girl who likes hot sex... I feel like I'm just passing through..... I have no Idea what " Ghost In The Shell" means to her...
even though I love Bladerunner... I feel we're ships that are passing too close....
But, the sex is good.. hell, it's great...if only I could come.