Ok, well, I'm really fuckin' annoyed right now. I was talking to my friend/ex-boyfriend today, and we just had the most fucked up conversation. I'm almost positive that he's just getting satisfaction from fucking with me. It's a little not ok. Here is the last piece of our conversation (which he brought up) concerning my amazing, lovely, and talented current guy (it took place on AIM; the sn's have been edited for clarity but it's otherwise unedited):
psychotic ex: am i making you angry?
me: man.. you're kind of a dick.. i'm not angry, per say. just.. regretting some of the nice things i said to you.
psychotic ex: oh come on i haven't said anything mean, i'm just trying to be opinionated. i figured thats what you needed right now.
psychotic ex: besides, i'm good in bed.
me: naw i don't really need anything right now.. i was just sorta talking.
psychotic ex: mwah hah.
psychotic ex: i like talking to you.
psychotic ex: i am excited about seeing you on the vacation, you know.
me: eh. whatever. i'm just not used to people being openly offensive toward me anymore i suppose. everyone in california loves me. i should start a fan club. i don't really understand it, but whatever.. anyhow, i'm looking forward to seeing you also, despite the fact that i'm scared of it.
psychotic ex: I'm sorry i was offensive. Curiously enough i'm just trying to be a good friend. I really don't even think about what happened, i just know you like him and that's my primary motivation.
psychotic ex: And i'm very happy for you and your fan club. I'm sure it's the hair.
me: hmm.. couldn't possibly be my natural charm and intellect?
psychotic ex: no no... hair. definitely the hair.
me: (i mean, the hair is hot, but regardless i'm still awesome..)
psychotic ex: if i was a lesser man i'd have ended that with a smiley.
psychotic ex: if i was a lesser man.
psychotic ex: Ok i have to go. i'm really glad you're feeling happy
me: yeah, yeah.. go bathe, or whatever.
me: ya fuckin punk
me: get a job
psychotic ex: maybe i'll just get paid for fuckin'. i heard in an email i was pretty good.
me: seriously, i'm going to assume it's just like, because of the mood your in and the fact that it's via the internet, but god are you an asshole today
psychotic ex: ha ha. you're silly.
me: wow. this is really kinda fucked up.
psychotic ex: what about it?
me: i don't know.. this conversation.
psychotic ex: in a bad way?
me: naw i dunno.. you just are not acting like the normal you.. then again i've been gone for a long time so i have no idea what that is.
psychotic ex: you might be right. I haven't met me for a while either. Have a good one bunny luv.
************ signed off at 8:10:34 PM.
(Incidentally any references to him being good in bed are due to a joke that I made in an email that I wrote him while I was drunk. And still joking.)
K, so that was just confusing, right? Particularly without the context, I'm sure - wait, no. There was no context. We were having a perfectly fucking decent conversation. I feel I handled it pretty well, honestly. That's pretty much just how I am. But still, I feel like something very bizarre and disconcerting just happened in my life.
Now seriously, I know what you're thinking: why would you be talking to your ex-boyfriend about new boyfriend long distance relationship problems, etc? Well, you see, until now he had been a perfectly normal human worm baby, and was at least un-fucked enough to have a civilized conversation. He's always been supportive of me, and always been there when I need him, albeit it is not too often. I have NO IDEA what the fuck just happened, but it is SO not kosher.
psychotic ex: am i making you angry?
me: man.. you're kind of a dick.. i'm not angry, per say. just.. regretting some of the nice things i said to you.
psychotic ex: oh come on i haven't said anything mean, i'm just trying to be opinionated. i figured thats what you needed right now.
psychotic ex: besides, i'm good in bed.
me: naw i don't really need anything right now.. i was just sorta talking.
psychotic ex: mwah hah.
psychotic ex: i like talking to you.
psychotic ex: i am excited about seeing you on the vacation, you know.
me: eh. whatever. i'm just not used to people being openly offensive toward me anymore i suppose. everyone in california loves me. i should start a fan club. i don't really understand it, but whatever.. anyhow, i'm looking forward to seeing you also, despite the fact that i'm scared of it.
psychotic ex: I'm sorry i was offensive. Curiously enough i'm just trying to be a good friend. I really don't even think about what happened, i just know you like him and that's my primary motivation.
psychotic ex: And i'm very happy for you and your fan club. I'm sure it's the hair.
me: hmm.. couldn't possibly be my natural charm and intellect?
psychotic ex: no no... hair. definitely the hair.
me: (i mean, the hair is hot, but regardless i'm still awesome..)
psychotic ex: if i was a lesser man i'd have ended that with a smiley.
psychotic ex: if i was a lesser man.
psychotic ex: Ok i have to go. i'm really glad you're feeling happy
me: yeah, yeah.. go bathe, or whatever.
me: ya fuckin punk
me: get a job
psychotic ex: maybe i'll just get paid for fuckin'. i heard in an email i was pretty good.
me: seriously, i'm going to assume it's just like, because of the mood your in and the fact that it's via the internet, but god are you an asshole today
psychotic ex: ha ha. you're silly.
me: wow. this is really kinda fucked up.
psychotic ex: what about it?
me: i don't know.. this conversation.
psychotic ex: in a bad way?
me: naw i dunno.. you just are not acting like the normal you.. then again i've been gone for a long time so i have no idea what that is.
psychotic ex: you might be right. I haven't met me for a while either. Have a good one bunny luv.
************ signed off at 8:10:34 PM.
(Incidentally any references to him being good in bed are due to a joke that I made in an email that I wrote him while I was drunk. And still joking.)
K, so that was just confusing, right? Particularly without the context, I'm sure - wait, no. There was no context. We were having a perfectly fucking decent conversation. I feel I handled it pretty well, honestly. That's pretty much just how I am. But still, I feel like something very bizarre and disconcerting just happened in my life.
Now seriously, I know what you're thinking: why would you be talking to your ex-boyfriend about new boyfriend long distance relationship problems, etc? Well, you see, until now he had been a perfectly normal human worm baby, and was at least un-fucked enough to have a civilized conversation. He's always been supportive of me, and always been there when I need him, albeit it is not too often. I have NO IDEA what the fuck just happened, but it is SO not kosher.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
Are things geting more serious w/ your current boy? Often times that makes the ex jealous - it's either: a) i can't have her so nobody will, or b) I always thought she would sorta stick around in case I ever wanted to get back together....
OR maybe he was just having an arsehole day... I'd tell him to piss off until he can be a grown up.
Ok here is what you need to do....
Youhim.
Hope you can work things out.
Later
ps: is the above CaptF your b/f. If so me and him have the same b-day.