miss_kitten

To demonstrate how much Christmas displeases me I decided to drive at high speed through a signpost, a hedge and two wooden fences,completely demolishing them all and my car - and probably my chance of getting insurance on anything faster than a 2CV ever again - spending lunchtime in the back of a police van getting interrogated and breathalized and making sure all and sundry left their turkey and came to the scene to sort out the panic / mess / fighting that ensued.

However, I feel that having come off the road at that speed and missing by mere centimeters less pliable objects that would have surely killed me, in fact I and the messiah. Not Jesus. Me Generations to come will revere the girl who had a very attention seeking and cataclysmic car crash and walked away without a scratch to her ethereal body on the very day of the old fake messiah and generate a new religion based on my purity and wisdom.

Amen.