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mingarden

Thingy.

Member Since 2004

Followers 4 Following 4

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Thursday Jul 28, 2005

Jul 28, 2005
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I've been pretty enamored of the "gay girls only" group on here, though I'm not sure my thoughts on the subject would be widely accepted so I choose to post them here instead of there.

It seems that the majority of women in that group either have boyfriends, or their primary choice is men (as mine tends to be...more on this later); this would make them, in my book, either bi or curious (gah, I hate that term!). In terms of the latter: maybe there should be a separate group for girls who are, for all intents and purposes, straight, but would still like to explore their sexuality with women. I don't say this because I don't think those girls belong in the gay group--far from it! I love 'em--but because I think it might be a more productive way for them to actually meet women of like-mind in their cities.

I realized yesterday that I have been sexually active with women for a decade. A decade! I think that puts me way outside the curious camp and firmly into the realm of bisexuality, though I never really thought of it that way. In fact, a friend of mine has designated me as "a little bit queer," and I like that way of putting it. I have loved women, had sex with women, crushed on women, dated women--for as long as I have done the same with men.

That said, I am utterly terrified of women, and I think that's why I usually end up with men. It has always been easier for me to identify with boys; most of my friends are male, and most activities I participate in have tended to be male-dominated. I don't know why that is, but it's been the case since I was little. I discussed this with my gentleman friend yesterday; he is also a bit queer, but is way more relaxed about it than I am. Since high school, he has been sexually active with boys and never really thought much of it. This blows my mind--not only because he's Southern, and I figured he might have run into some trouble on that account, but because I am constantly racked with issues of identity (sexual and otherwise). He doesn't seem to think that his sexuality has anything to do with who he is, whereas I am very caught up in it. Who I have sex with and fall in love with is integral to my identity, because it has such bearing on how I live my life. Whether that has more to do with culture and society than my own little brain is irrelevant; when I'm with a woman, I'm just different. I feel different, look different.

Enough of this inarticulate rambling. Any thoughts?
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
shawndaddy:
Outer Limits Tattoo. They have some amazing artists there. I've been going for years.
Jul 29, 2005
cincity:
Well, i am in that group as well and have noticed a flux of curious women/or bi...what have you. I know what I am and that is all about some ladies.....love woman could not fathom being with a man?
Now the simplicity with a man....yes it will be simple as to where it is harder with women but in the long run it's just worth it with a woman for me.....I would rather spend a lifetime "searching for her than settling with him." oooo...that sounded good I just impressed myself! smile
Jul 29, 2005

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