mineux

Im really trying to catch up to a comfortable place in this ebb and flow of realities. Sometimes he loves me, sometimes he hates me. I think he just needs an excuse to block out the feelings he has. He must really hate loving me. Truth be told, i hate loving him to, but i would be there in a heartbeat if he called.
Its such a sick give and take... 9 years of.....
"i love you" "i hate you" "you rock" "i have no respect for you" "you make me sing" "you dissapoint me" "you forgot me" "i never forgot you" "who are you?" "where have you been?" "come over" "why arent you here?" "the door is open" "i'll give you money for gas" "i need you" "stop calling" "leave me the fuck alone" "You're jealous" "Im not jealous" "who was that on the phone?" "who's that girl on your myspace?" "who's that guy leaving you comments all day?" "myspace isnt life, im blocking you" "what did you mean in that blog" "you blocked, me, so why are you reading my blog?" "nevermind" "this is why i could never be with you, the lies" "what about YOUR lies?" "i dont know what you are talking about."

"i miss you"
" *melts*"

fuck this is complicated...