Since moving to Portland, I must've gained 20 lbs. Can you blame me? This is a beer drinker's paradise with happy hour specials in every pub, cafe, and coffeeshop in town. Yes, i said coffeeshop! (Tiny's on 12th and Hawthorne: $1.50 Redstripes everyday 6-10pm.) Combine all of those delicious, empy calories and lots of killer herb, and you got one bloated Mikey. Add cigs to the mix and you got one sickly, bloated Mikey.
To that end, I'm putting the alcohol on hold, quitting the cigs and on a juice fast until I can't stand it any longer. It's been a day and a half and while I am hungry, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. Not craving the smokes too badly, either. In fact, I feel pretty damn good. Lots of water and Hungarian "Hibiskis" tea are keeping my bladder active. Thought you'd like to know that.
So, here's my "Body Purge" juice recipe that seems to be helping:
3 lbs Carrots
2 lbs tomatoes
1/2 lb of an Oregon Sweet onion
a dozen cloves of garlic
1/4 lb of spinach
1/4 lb of parsley
a bunch of beet greens
1 large Jalepeo
The shit tastes like bloody mary mix! Just enough spice to keep my mouth and ass awake. One drawback: I smell. Raw garlic and onion juice go straight to my pores. If I don't leave my apartment for a few days, that's why.
[insert dirty hippie comment here]
To that end, I'm putting the alcohol on hold, quitting the cigs and on a juice fast until I can't stand it any longer. It's been a day and a half and while I am hungry, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. Not craving the smokes too badly, either. In fact, I feel pretty damn good. Lots of water and Hungarian "Hibiskis" tea are keeping my bladder active. Thought you'd like to know that.
So, here's my "Body Purge" juice recipe that seems to be helping:
3 lbs Carrots
2 lbs tomatoes
1/2 lb of an Oregon Sweet onion
a dozen cloves of garlic
1/4 lb of spinach
1/4 lb of parsley
a bunch of beet greens
1 large Jalepeo
The shit tastes like bloody mary mix! Just enough spice to keep my mouth and ass awake. One drawback: I smell. Raw garlic and onion juice go straight to my pores. If I don't leave my apartment for a few days, that's why.
[insert dirty hippie comment here]
VIEW 26 of 26 COMMENTS
sabine:
well we have radiators but they don't work worth a fuck...they're pretty old and useless.
hansel:
There's only one good way to get that look.. Real Gresham meth!