I think a sales girl at Helzberg diamonds offended me more than I have been offended by anyone in a LONG time. Last week I lost one of my beautiful little everyday earrings at the spa. I called and went back, but it was gone.
I went to the mall with my son and on the way out a piece of jewelry at Helzberg's caught my eye. Within seconds a sales girl came and offered to show me some pieces. I told her I was just browsing but actually was sort of looking for some fairly inexpensive white gold and diamond tiny hoops for everyday wear. She showed me a few but they were not quite what I wanted. I was then handed off to another sales woman.
She took me to the "Clearance" section and showed me a few things there but I wasn't feeling it. The counter mounted mirrors show no-one's good angle and the lighting from above makes the jewels sparkle but made me look like the crypt keeper. The new Clinique powder foundation I just bought at Macy's wasn't doing me any favors either.
I told the sales woman that nothing was really doing it for me and I would need to come back. I told her I wanted to feel good when I bought my earrings and the way I look in this light and in this mirror I just look old and ugly and like I have more chins than I really have and no matter how pretty the earrings might be the overall effect wasn't doing it for me. I said the lighting and mirrors in this place are really bad. The sales woman (girl) gave me this pity look which was not endearing. Then she said "I don't have a problem with the mirror, but I like myself." I was a little insulted because this is insinuating that because I think bad lighting and an up angle don't flatter me when I'm about to spend money on something to beautify myself I now have no self esteem?? But I let it go and turned the mirror around so she could see it. I then said, really, that's your best angle? I don't think that's anyone's best angle, there should be higher mirrors. (I was actually smiling the whole time I said this). She looked into the mirror briefly and with the most huffy, snitty little hmpf sound said "I look the same way I always look." I gave her a skeptical look and an insulted look, because if she looks exactly the same, then the up angled mirror and the down lighting isn't the problem then I guess I really DO look like the crypt keeper. She then said "I like myself and I know I'm beautiful. You should come back when you have self esteem and feel better about yourself."
My son and I vacated the store as though there were bees loose. I was so shocked and stunned I was speechless!!! My son and I walked from Helzberg's all the way through Macy's in silence. When we got outside I turned to him and said, is it just me or was that one of the most insulting things you have ever heard. My son said yeah, that was pretty insulting, I can't believe someone with that little tact has a job.
We spent the next hour trying to figure out any way for that not to have been incredibly insulting. I then called 2 of my girlfriends and my husband and told them what happened and they were also appalled.
I talked about harsh lighting and an up angle and this sales person managed to make it about me being pathetic with no self esteem. Maybe wherever she hangs out people have given her kudo's for seeing the beauty in herself, because I could see where it might be a challenge for someone who looks like her, but in the context of ME trying to buy myself some jewelry and not "feeling it" today, her "self esteem" was nothing but annoying and insulting and has ensured that I will never even step into that store again.
What do you think? Is there any way for that not to be insulting? I was really not fishing for a compliment, nor was I really full of self hate. I'm 34, I'm not happy because age is catching up with me and it sucks but I certainly don't hate myself. I also don't believe putting effort into your appearance means you don't like yourself. I don't think cosmetic surgery is an act of self hate, I don't think make up or exercise or anything else a person does to improve their looks or to feel as good about themselves as they can is any act of self hate either. The good thing about me getting older is that I can now wear much bigger jewelry and it looks good. I can also wear a St. John sweater set and look like a million bucks rather than like I raided my grandma's closet. But I would rather look 29 again.
I also get really REALLY sick of people who are more overweight or less in line with the standards of attractiveness than another person getting offended when the less heavy or more attractive person has something they don't like about themselves. So really, because my best friend weighs 10 lbs less than I do I can complain about my weight to her but she is not allowed to complain to me about her desire to lose 10 lbs? That is such utter and complete bullshit to me. She is my friend. If she weighs 119 lbs and is unhappy about a little table spoon sized lump of fat on her thigh, who am I to be so self involved that because I have 20 lbs to lose I'm not able to offer her comfort or sympathy for her problem area. Her tablespoon of fat is all about her. It has nothing to do with me.
Grrr, I'm so annoyed because that was just SO rude and uncalled for. In this economy, that rude girl has no business having a job where she interacts with the public at all. All I can keep thinking about is the 10,000 people who lined up for the 1000 jobs at Mc.Donald's job fair a few weeks ago.
I went to the mall with my son and on the way out a piece of jewelry at Helzberg's caught my eye. Within seconds a sales girl came and offered to show me some pieces. I told her I was just browsing but actually was sort of looking for some fairly inexpensive white gold and diamond tiny hoops for everyday wear. She showed me a few but they were not quite what I wanted. I was then handed off to another sales woman.
She took me to the "Clearance" section and showed me a few things there but I wasn't feeling it. The counter mounted mirrors show no-one's good angle and the lighting from above makes the jewels sparkle but made me look like the crypt keeper. The new Clinique powder foundation I just bought at Macy's wasn't doing me any favors either.
I told the sales woman that nothing was really doing it for me and I would need to come back. I told her I wanted to feel good when I bought my earrings and the way I look in this light and in this mirror I just look old and ugly and like I have more chins than I really have and no matter how pretty the earrings might be the overall effect wasn't doing it for me. I said the lighting and mirrors in this place are really bad. The sales woman (girl) gave me this pity look which was not endearing. Then she said "I don't have a problem with the mirror, but I like myself." I was a little insulted because this is insinuating that because I think bad lighting and an up angle don't flatter me when I'm about to spend money on something to beautify myself I now have no self esteem?? But I let it go and turned the mirror around so she could see it. I then said, really, that's your best angle? I don't think that's anyone's best angle, there should be higher mirrors. (I was actually smiling the whole time I said this). She looked into the mirror briefly and with the most huffy, snitty little hmpf sound said "I look the same way I always look." I gave her a skeptical look and an insulted look, because if she looks exactly the same, then the up angled mirror and the down lighting isn't the problem then I guess I really DO look like the crypt keeper. She then said "I like myself and I know I'm beautiful. You should come back when you have self esteem and feel better about yourself."
My son and I vacated the store as though there were bees loose. I was so shocked and stunned I was speechless!!! My son and I walked from Helzberg's all the way through Macy's in silence. When we got outside I turned to him and said, is it just me or was that one of the most insulting things you have ever heard. My son said yeah, that was pretty insulting, I can't believe someone with that little tact has a job.
We spent the next hour trying to figure out any way for that not to have been incredibly insulting. I then called 2 of my girlfriends and my husband and told them what happened and they were also appalled.
I talked about harsh lighting and an up angle and this sales person managed to make it about me being pathetic with no self esteem. Maybe wherever she hangs out people have given her kudo's for seeing the beauty in herself, because I could see where it might be a challenge for someone who looks like her, but in the context of ME trying to buy myself some jewelry and not "feeling it" today, her "self esteem" was nothing but annoying and insulting and has ensured that I will never even step into that store again.
What do you think? Is there any way for that not to be insulting? I was really not fishing for a compliment, nor was I really full of self hate. I'm 34, I'm not happy because age is catching up with me and it sucks but I certainly don't hate myself. I also don't believe putting effort into your appearance means you don't like yourself. I don't think cosmetic surgery is an act of self hate, I don't think make up or exercise or anything else a person does to improve their looks or to feel as good about themselves as they can is any act of self hate either. The good thing about me getting older is that I can now wear much bigger jewelry and it looks good. I can also wear a St. John sweater set and look like a million bucks rather than like I raided my grandma's closet. But I would rather look 29 again.
I also get really REALLY sick of people who are more overweight or less in line with the standards of attractiveness than another person getting offended when the less heavy or more attractive person has something they don't like about themselves. So really, because my best friend weighs 10 lbs less than I do I can complain about my weight to her but she is not allowed to complain to me about her desire to lose 10 lbs? That is such utter and complete bullshit to me. She is my friend. If she weighs 119 lbs and is unhappy about a little table spoon sized lump of fat on her thigh, who am I to be so self involved that because I have 20 lbs to lose I'm not able to offer her comfort or sympathy for her problem area. Her tablespoon of fat is all about her. It has nothing to do with me.
Grrr, I'm so annoyed because that was just SO rude and uncalled for. In this economy, that rude girl has no business having a job where she interacts with the public at all. All I can keep thinking about is the 10,000 people who lined up for the 1000 jobs at Mc.Donald's job fair a few weeks ago.
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
pfft! she thinks she's a psychologist! greaaaaaaaaaaat!
sales people PISS me off in general!