you know what? i think i am going to start using this blog thing more. its the only place where i can write what i want without feeling like too many people that i write about are looking. haha
but isnt this the part in the movie where something changes? where is my plot twist, where is my resolution?
its not coming and its time for me to face that. sure shit have been going OK but i dont settle for OK. OK is too boring. i am at a literal stand still in the same place i was a year ago. same school, talking to the same people that are not good for me always, doing more stupid shit....
sure the band got signed, sure we went on tour, but what really changed? now its just at a national level where i feel personally attacked. love/hate with any thing i do...
i always see things that way. and seemingly no matter what i do, there is something wrong.
am i too hard? or not hard enough? should i keep pushing myself into an idealized happiness? or should i back down and learn to take things more with stride?
i have so many ideas in my head that i cant get out anymore. not on paper not on strings, not in relationships, and certainly not in school...
i need to get outta chicago for a weekend... and i mean soon.
too bad i am broke..
all in all.... i think i might just need to get laid. 5 months is far too long... haha
but isnt this the part in the movie where something changes? where is my plot twist, where is my resolution?
its not coming and its time for me to face that. sure shit have been going OK but i dont settle for OK. OK is too boring. i am at a literal stand still in the same place i was a year ago. same school, talking to the same people that are not good for me always, doing more stupid shit....
sure the band got signed, sure we went on tour, but what really changed? now its just at a national level where i feel personally attacked. love/hate with any thing i do...
i always see things that way. and seemingly no matter what i do, there is something wrong.
am i too hard? or not hard enough? should i keep pushing myself into an idealized happiness? or should i back down and learn to take things more with stride?
i have so many ideas in my head that i cant get out anymore. not on paper not on strings, not in relationships, and certainly not in school...
i need to get outta chicago for a weekend... and i mean soon.
too bad i am broke..
all in all.... i think i might just need to get laid. 5 months is far too long... haha
pervymama:
If you need to get out of Chicago, come down here! I mean, I know Indiana sucks, but Ian would love to see you (and he'd probably pay for you to come, too).