All removables, all transitory/ All removables, passing always
Belated Merry Christmas to y'all! Hope you are still wrapped in a warm cocoon of rich food, seasonal booze, some decent TV and a warm house with lie-ins. I am not. I had to return to work today and I've had so much Christmas sugary snacks my head feels like it will explode. Silly MP, you never learn...
..Is there any news in Rug? Is there balls! I like the festive season but I hate the lack of action in the area it generates. Everyone is off work, outspoken councillors, media savvy schools, even the ne'er do wells who create front page splashes with their antics. And we've already resorted to unwanted animals/ reviews of the year for this week's paper. Bugger. Looks like I'm pounding the streets tomorrow for scoops. And it's drifting weather, the kind where you can't walk, you just drift because you can't feel your feet.
I may look as slack as usual RE the lack of posting, but this time I have a genuine reason for my grumpiness.
Things I have lost in the past two months include:
*My houseshare, which I was happy in, with less than two weeks notice. It was either that or fork out 600 last month to carry on living in said house (one month's rent plus deposit) It really wasn't worth it so I am now living out of suitcases at my boy's house, where my bed would have been a large novelty inflatable mobile phone I got at this year's V Festival if I didn't share his bed.
'My lovely housemate, who has buggered off to the outskirts of Manchester. Fair play, her workplace was near there, but a shame for me 'cos I liked her- she calmed me the hell down when I was tearing my hair out.
*Two senior reporters who I got on with the best at work (one of which also calmed me the hell down). They have gone to other papers and not yet been replaced, leaving us with extra workloads and stress.
*The ability to go to bed before 1am on a Tuesday evening because of not taking work home in the evenings. See above.
*All contact with my ex (see all pre September 2005 entries). I don't know if this is a good thing or not. The thought of him and me together makes me physically sick, but he was interesting to talk to.
*Most of my intellegence/ eloquence. Or so it would appear. I keep forgetting to do stuff in my everyday life and end up rattling out utter nonsense whenever I speak to anyone. I utterly hate this and having seen my depression return three months ago and linger like a towel thrown over my head, it is making me even worse. Any tips to get it back?
Fucking hell, I hate to see good things come to an end. It feels like so many doors are closing at the moment and I can't see the windows attempting to open. Days are flashing past me and I'm drifting through life, I don't feel like I'm living anymore 'cos I'm whacked out on caffiene all the time. My body semi-crashed on Friday evening when I made the train trip back to Sussex for Christmas and I haven't recovered much since.
Something's got to give. I just don't know how long it will take before it does, and I don't know what the fallout will be, but I just wish I could diffuse the situation. I can't even fucking write properly anymore.
Like Richard James Edwards I want to hibernate. But I wouldn't do it for more than 12 years, like he seems intent on doing (Is he dead? In 1997 I said no, in 2000 I said yes, in 2006 I just don't know anymore.) I think I will have a couple of years here then go to Japan and teach for three years on the Jet Programme. I made that decision last week and since I did I've felt a little weight lifting. Hopefully 2007 will bring a little sunrise. But then again I've always been afraid of the future.
"I look to the future, it makes me cry"
(Mata ne, MP-chan wa yokunai desu. Demo motto oshite, o matte kudasai.)
Belated Merry Christmas to y'all! Hope you are still wrapped in a warm cocoon of rich food, seasonal booze, some decent TV and a warm house with lie-ins. I am not. I had to return to work today and I've had so much Christmas sugary snacks my head feels like it will explode. Silly MP, you never learn...
..Is there any news in Rug? Is there balls! I like the festive season but I hate the lack of action in the area it generates. Everyone is off work, outspoken councillors, media savvy schools, even the ne'er do wells who create front page splashes with their antics. And we've already resorted to unwanted animals/ reviews of the year for this week's paper. Bugger. Looks like I'm pounding the streets tomorrow for scoops. And it's drifting weather, the kind where you can't walk, you just drift because you can't feel your feet.
I may look as slack as usual RE the lack of posting, but this time I have a genuine reason for my grumpiness.
Things I have lost in the past two months include:
*My houseshare, which I was happy in, with less than two weeks notice. It was either that or fork out 600 last month to carry on living in said house (one month's rent plus deposit) It really wasn't worth it so I am now living out of suitcases at my boy's house, where my bed would have been a large novelty inflatable mobile phone I got at this year's V Festival if I didn't share his bed.
'My lovely housemate, who has buggered off to the outskirts of Manchester. Fair play, her workplace was near there, but a shame for me 'cos I liked her- she calmed me the hell down when I was tearing my hair out.
*Two senior reporters who I got on with the best at work (one of which also calmed me the hell down). They have gone to other papers and not yet been replaced, leaving us with extra workloads and stress.
*The ability to go to bed before 1am on a Tuesday evening because of not taking work home in the evenings. See above.
*All contact with my ex (see all pre September 2005 entries). I don't know if this is a good thing or not. The thought of him and me together makes me physically sick, but he was interesting to talk to.
*Most of my intellegence/ eloquence. Or so it would appear. I keep forgetting to do stuff in my everyday life and end up rattling out utter nonsense whenever I speak to anyone. I utterly hate this and having seen my depression return three months ago and linger like a towel thrown over my head, it is making me even worse. Any tips to get it back?
Fucking hell, I hate to see good things come to an end. It feels like so many doors are closing at the moment and I can't see the windows attempting to open. Days are flashing past me and I'm drifting through life, I don't feel like I'm living anymore 'cos I'm whacked out on caffiene all the time. My body semi-crashed on Friday evening when I made the train trip back to Sussex for Christmas and I haven't recovered much since.
Something's got to give. I just don't know how long it will take before it does, and I don't know what the fallout will be, but I just wish I could diffuse the situation. I can't even fucking write properly anymore.
Like Richard James Edwards I want to hibernate. But I wouldn't do it for more than 12 years, like he seems intent on doing (Is he dead? In 1997 I said no, in 2000 I said yes, in 2006 I just don't know anymore.) I think I will have a couple of years here then go to Japan and teach for three years on the Jet Programme. I made that decision last week and since I did I've felt a little weight lifting. Hopefully 2007 will bring a little sunrise. But then again I've always been afraid of the future.
"I look to the future, it makes me cry"
(Mata ne, MP-chan wa yokunai desu. Demo motto oshite, o matte kudasai.)
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
deak:
broke on trent!
cdt21:
Happy Birthday 