wow, i was told something that made me smile. a very close friend told me that "i dont think it's anything you're doing wrong. it's what theyre doing wrong-not going out with you! hahaha. anyway, it's probably just the universe saving you from a bad relationship, so dont worry about it. i know it really really sucks but it's for the best. "
now i believe her, not because im looking to bulid selfasteem or because she's my friend. its because im a firm believer in karma and there being the one and only soul mate for us all. in my past that i wish i could for get, but i cant. I've had two major relationships, now what i mean by major is, being in engaged for two years, and having both relationships last 3 years. Now what i find funny about them both, is that they told me i was the best thing to happen to them, they wanted to grow old with me, and they wanted to have my childeren. (both of them missed there periods for one day and clamed to be pregnant)
both of them had me, and both of them lied!!!!
they fucked me over and then tryed to put the blame on me
but i understand now, love is both painful and pleasurable
but when two different ppl USE it to ganin control over some one is uncalled for!
why must they blame others for there selfish ways?
THAT is CHILDISH!
i dont understand, why i am concitered cold hearted or a monster when i dont want them back after they hurt me so bad to the point where all i do is sit in my room and cry my slef to sleep.
they break my heart, leave me, call me only to yell, and im the fucking monster.
now thats fucking priceless.
ppl these days, there a fucking riot. all ways blaming the one that looks or seems weak.
but i dont worrie about what happens to them any more, do i get up set?
of coruse i do. im human am i not?, well i think i am.
but when i go to the my shell, something ugly comes out to play
thats when i question weather or not i truly am human.
ayways my point being is
from now on, i will speak my mind
express my self in anyway i want to
and put this feeling of love on hold untill i find her
the my one, my soul mate
and karma is a bitch and IT will find thoes that done harm to me and will punish THEM ALL!
now i believe her, not because im looking to bulid selfasteem or because she's my friend. its because im a firm believer in karma and there being the one and only soul mate for us all. in my past that i wish i could for get, but i cant. I've had two major relationships, now what i mean by major is, being in engaged for two years, and having both relationships last 3 years. Now what i find funny about them both, is that they told me i was the best thing to happen to them, they wanted to grow old with me, and they wanted to have my childeren. (both of them missed there periods for one day and clamed to be pregnant)
both of them had me, and both of them lied!!!!
they fucked me over and then tryed to put the blame on me
but i understand now, love is both painful and pleasurable
but when two different ppl USE it to ganin control over some one is uncalled for!
why must they blame others for there selfish ways?
THAT is CHILDISH!
i dont understand, why i am concitered cold hearted or a monster when i dont want them back after they hurt me so bad to the point where all i do is sit in my room and cry my slef to sleep.
they break my heart, leave me, call me only to yell, and im the fucking monster.
now thats fucking priceless.
ppl these days, there a fucking riot. all ways blaming the one that looks or seems weak.
but i dont worrie about what happens to them any more, do i get up set?
of coruse i do. im human am i not?, well i think i am.
but when i go to the my shell, something ugly comes out to play

thats when i question weather or not i truly am human.
ayways my point being is
from now on, i will speak my mind
express my self in anyway i want to
and put this feeling of love on hold untill i find her
the my one, my soul mate
and karma is a bitch and IT will find thoes that done harm to me and will punish THEM ALL!
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