So @missy @lyxzen @rambo keep choosing REALLY good @bloghomework topics:
Share an experience from your past that helped shape you into the person you are today.
I just got off work and have been wading around my house trying to think of something good, genuinely good. Something that wouldn't make you all feel like you've read it before or get bored. Well what I came up with I'm not sure if it would be considered a "past experience" maybe EXPERINCES? Maybe just a person that shaped me... or a personality. Anyways I'll go ahead and get on with it! Enjoy!
I think many of us have suffered from not being the "favorite" child but it was more than that. I am the youngest of 2 daughters and divorced parents. My dad has another family where "half" and "step" brothers and sisters come into place but that part is irrelevant. So we will start at the beginning of it all. My mother and father met and got married and all that good stuff. when it came to having children, my mom wasn't very enthusiastic about it but my dad REALLY wanted a family so she agreed to ONE child, my older sister Valerie (who by the way is one of the coolest people ever) after that my mom started getting birth control shots and was already incapable of being a mom to my sister but they made it work.
Three and half years later she became pregnant with me. I remember my dad telling me that when she told her parents they said "Oh no Honey you don't need that." Around that time my parent's marriage wasn't going so well. As I've heard, throughout the whole 8 months whenever my dad and mom fought she would always threaten to go get an abortion. So I became a martyr in a way.. I guess. On June 6, 1995 little ol me was born! 5 weeks early and I came home from the hospital with no name. I was so tiny I could fit in doll clothes. Any ways my mom was already kind of tapped out on he whole "Mom" thing so she left me at my grandparents a lot so she could go shopping and my dad would take my sister because he owned his own business. So I was alone a lot, always running around the neighborhood and playing a lot of video games. To this day, my sister and I quite frequently wonder where our parents were all the time. The house was always dark, and quiet.
By the age of 10 my parents were in a really toxic divorce. My mom was terminally ill and Valerie was a rebellious teenage girl. our parents used us a lot to injure one another. My mom mainly, did the craziest things like lock us in an attic one summer.. but after a while my sister ran away at the age of 16. My dad had started a new family. So it was just the 2 of us, she would always scream at me and use her illness against me a lot. It was that way until the day I moved out and honestly it still is to this day.
I grew up knowing that my mom never wanted me, probably resents me, alone. She did borderline EVIL things to me. That shaped me into who I am and I am very proud of who I am. Not having a mother has never been a real problem but there have been times when I see a mother and daughter and it gets to me, that I've never had that. Girls always made fun of me, and I never fit in. I never had boyfriend advice. Or a mother to hold me when I was sick. But instead... I learned from mistakes ALOT... of mistakes. I learned how to take care of myself. I became what I wanted to be. I taught myself things. I knew that I could always trust my instincts. I worked hard and I never counted on anyone. I love, I care, and I cherish every relationship I have whether its romantic or friendly because I never want anyone to feel how I felt.
Hope you all have enjoyed the read!
Meera
