I have been thinking a lot lately, and a mix between thinking and visiting Las Vegas a few times in the past few months I feel like that is where I want to go. I'm sick of the same routine every day, every week, every month. I'm sick of seeing a bunch of people that I do not like and that I could really live without. Also, it's not like it'd cost me more to live there, and it's warmer there. I hate the cold and I hate that there's nothing to do here. I'm sick of feeling trapped. I mean there will be a few things I'll miss but I feel it's best for me to take a chance and see what else is out there for me. I just need some sort of change, I need new places and new faces and to actually start getting things together. I feel the place I have been calling home my whole life is actually just another place, it have never really felt like home. And then there's that one thing I can't get my mind off, and I continue to pretend like it doesn't bother me, and I continue to not talk about it to most people. And the few that I have talked to about it I end up lying and changing my mind about what I want them to know about the subject. I feel like the only way to get rid of this horrible topic is to leave this area. I have burnt too many bridges and I need a fresh new start!!