mavenist

Last few days have been good.
I've been working quite a bit, which is good.
Time with Jay was nice. We've been playing wii.
We watched the movie Hard Candy.. it was a very good movie. But, it hasn't been helping my dreams. I keep having rape dreams. It's not to the point where we're having sex but it keeps going through me fighting the guy off and running. This has happened like 4 times in the last week. I don't know what is going on in my head or why i'm having these. Hopefully they go away soon.

Yesterday was nice. Jay and I made breakfast together and then I baked some gluten-free chocolate chip muffins. Then we hung out and watched the super bowl. Had pizza and chips and dip. Then I made stir fry for dinner. It was a good, at home day.

I'm home alone today and tomorrow but i'm going to make the best of it.
I'm waiting to hear some news from Jay today... Hopefully good news. *fingers crossed*

I've had some stuff in my head lately. Sometimes, I think about getting into contact with my dads ex girlfriend.. maybe try to make amends of sorts. I didn't talk to her much after my father was killed but I hear shes gotten sober and is doing pretty good.

I've been thinking a bit about the guy that killed my dad. Time is going by quickly. He should be up for parole in the next year-ish, I think. I'm still trying to figure out my feelings on it all. The problem is that I will never know who this man is. I will never know his character or the state of his heart. I will see the outside and that will be it. How do you judge someone on this?
I've lost so much, but he has a family too. Violent crimes affect so many people.

Well, I know i'm thankful for what I have today.
Sometimes i'm emotional, sometimes i'm a bit discontent but all in all, my life is pretty darn good. I have a nice place to live, a job that pays decent, a car, a boyfriend that cherishes me and supports me and a few good friends.