mary

hi everyone i need to let you know whats up i guess...you see, i kinda dont like the way that club works too much. i guess im not quite "the type" for what typically seems to be a way-too-steamy-date environment. so, for those of you who do want to come down and support my school fund, please email me and let me know when you plan to come in....as long as sg members are coming, i will go and have a blast....otherwise im not into the attitude of the general clientel. im not trying to be a snob, but im also not interested in being an absolute slut either....so please please let me know your plans and then come if you say so, cause otherwise im stuck dealing with creeps most the evening!!! hahaha its actually kinda funny to me because i am not especially sensitive and it amuses me the way some guys think they are saying things that will suddenly convince you, as a woman, to forgo any sense of personal morals. that being said i am not opposed to peeling my lingerie off in front of cute, fun people, boy or girl, which is quite obvious im sure seeing as how there is a giant naked picture of me on this screen even as i type and i am sitting rathar conspicuously at an internet cafe in the fucking tenderloin with a small audience loitering behind my back ( i hope they read that...yes that means you, guy with beard!!! haha) anyway, as a sidenote story, id like to give a congrats to the two bartenders of the hemlock bar on polk street who saved my almost-ruined opinion of the place....and stick my imaginary tongue out (most immaturely) at the one blond bartender who needs to take an anger-management class!! he completely freaked out on me as i was walking toward the bar three minutes to closing last night, with my beer, taking a last swig on my way to set it down and exit, when he ran over screaming "get out!!!!" i was kinda shocked for two seconds and i said..."why are you yelling like that?" and he said, "BECAUSE I TOLD YOU TO GET THE FUCK OUT!!!!" and i said "im going right now..." but as the words came out he grabbed my arm really hard and literally dragged me to the door and shoved me out!! the thing that really made no sense is that id had three beers all night, and had silently sat in a corner drawing alone, so there was absolutely no way i could have offended him! but, the story ends like this, outside, two other bartenders came over and apologised very sweetly and explained that blond-ass had a bad experience involving wine or something, and made me decide not to hate the place...so if you read this boys...way to go....i like you! and to the group sitting around me half the night...yes i was eavesdropping alittle and you all need to talk less about how everyone else needs to be more fashion-unique and ask yourself whether or not you are unique in any way, including your own fashion, which strangely resembled every single one of your friends.
anyway im trying to decide whether to head in tonight or not...ugh, i hope one of you people come down and have a drink at least with me.
and to the commenters who reminded me about grants for school..yes of course that is on my list of things to do...i hope very much to gain a full scholarship for school through my portfolio, and will try everything. but you cant always cover it all that way and until someone says HEY i want to fund you, im going to assume it is my responsibility to pay for. and anyway even a full scholarship or huge grant doest always help with the apartment thing or food money, and i hope to be able to get a job out there but everything is pretty hazy now, and i am unwilling to mess up the chance because i didnt do everything i possibly could!! but thanks for the advice!!
okay now im just procrastinating because i really dont want to work tonight....but i should.....sigh.