mary

that poem is absolutely fantastic

"....his eyelashes seemed to curl up like those of the contented cows in butter commercials". yeah. I had to stop reading for a minute and laugh at that one. Nice visual.

I wish I knew whether your words are as beautiful as they seem to me now
Or whether I want to sleep with your picture

Wow, That is so well put. I've had a long spell where I've not met anyone special in my life, and I long for that again. But I remember being so absolutely shattered in the past by my relationships. Back then I used to jump from relationship to relationship. I was so sure it was better to be in any relationship than to be alone. To give you an idea, I almost moved to New Zealand for a girl I had never been in the presence of (just phone/internet.) It took a lot of time to mend, she was my world. I remember just barely managing to go to work for months. It emptied me out and there was nothing left but surviving. Eventually I found that being single wasn't too bad, at first a necessity to recover, later a choice (in the lack of interesting girls.) That said, the romantic spark is still there. It was hard to hold on to it for a while, but out of all my bad/hard relationships, good things still came... so I knew romance and love could be worth it. And I regret none of it. I hope one day (soon) I find someone to be passionate about again. The memory of that feeling still haunts me.

It is heartening to know that someone so beautiful and talented as you struggles with shyness when confronting someone from your past. (referencing your next blog) I say go for it. Be a true romantic and go say hi. Don't force it, just be yourself. If I were that guy I'd be flattered, and that sort of thing comes rarely for most guys. If he doesn't find you amazing, it is his loss.

That said, now the task at hand is to remember to live up to my own advice. That's the tough part.

While I appreciate your thoughtfulness, I believe that many of today's concepts of love have been created by the media. Unfortunately, Hollywood films generally end when romance just begins, and fail to take into account the inevitable ebb and flow of love.

In my humble opinion there is no greater love and no better sex than that between friends, but good old friendship lacks the type of drama and fireworks that results in box office smashes. I suppose my point is that maybe we all try too hard to find "the one", and then when we fail, we summon the will to keep trying, but isn't this "one" really just a fabrication of 21st century marketing?

Perhaps friendship is actually at our fingertips, and human nature dictates that we desire that which may never be available.

Mary, just read this passage- it spoke to me,
thank you, i am seriously missing her after a year & find myself
saying "no more"...i cannot, will not, love another...
so much passion, love, within...you are right, keep the fight,
open a vein, let your love flow...have courage to open to another.

i know how you feel about being overwhelmed. i like to think of a happy image or imagine myself doing something that i know will make me smile. it really helps. i know it sounds cheesy. (i picture myself eating lime popsicles. )

hey your here!!

hope your life is going great!!