mamabunny

i hate this laptop....i just wrote all this shit and it dissapeared. anyway im tired ive been working 15hr days 7 days aweek in omaha on these damn tornados. its good money and ill be able to get a new car when i get home. im watching a show on transexuals....its interesting they are show ing the change over process. man im really super pissed cause i had written like a fuckload. i miss home. heh. my stinky messy apartment. i didnt tell the friend that i like goodbye. i feel kinda fucked up. but i dunno its hard. shes just a kid. i do love her to death. i feel tho that she whether she realizes in or not uses me for alcohol or drugs or rides...it sounds so silly.... i just have a hard time letting people go. my friends mean a lot to me. and my philosophy has to be to love all people and to be a positive silent influence on their lives. she tells me all the time how much i have impacted her and when we talk she sounds so assured of herself...but then every weekend she is getting wasted and making really bad decisions and putting herself around the people that shes knows are bringing her down. bleh i dunno... i havent thought mjuch about this ive been so busy and tired. but i REALLY feel that we are in each others paths for reasons unknown...that infinite knowledge exchange thing heh. indeed the last thing i need to do is get into a relationship with her and...i know it.

i really want another tattoo errrrr. i cant wait till i get back thats one of the first things im gonna do....besides buy a cay YAY. workworkworkwork. god maya angelou is so cool....silly old women. i heard this site had a really good community...and it does. hehe. im starting to like this journal thing heh. i promise when i get back home where i have a good stable computer i will reply in you guys' journals..i proommmise. no more 5am bedtime. well...thats whats in my brain...
but
my brain/body is tired. i have to get up at 6am and work again till 8pm.

namasteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

MAMA B.