I have to say - this has been a brutal 10 day period of time. My husband and I have run at fill tilt, sleeping in shifts so that we can look after his grandmother. We have both gotten to the point that we have literally collapsed and come down with the flu.
After a depressing Christmas day of going over and over various angles - we have come to the conclusion that his grandmother needs the sort of round the clock care that we are not qualified to provide.
Just last night I found her shuffling down the hall way without her walker, claiming to need some coffe and wanting to "let us sleep". She's already fallen numerous times and only by dumb luck has she not really hurt herself.
And despite all of the evidence, my husband and I still feel guilty that we are unable to quit our jobs and sleep in shifts to keep her in one piece.
We have looked into some reputable facilities, and have found two that are well staffed, very clean, and homey-loooking, and we're going to take Granny to see then next week.
*sigh* It's all very sad - but that's how it goes, right? We humans start out unable to take care of ourselves....and up up pretty much the same way. Granny has a PhD in Russian literature and has received numerous scholarly awards - and now she's reduced to wearing "incontinence undergarments" and laying in bed being fed potato soup and apple juice.
There IS one very funny aspect to this situation. Granny has always been a very arrogant, bossy, manipulative woman - and now that we are caring for her full time, she is straining herself to be something like gracious - and I know it's agonizing for her
It's always interesting to watch not-nice people try to be nice. It's kind of like watching Jessica Simpson trying to read Dante's Inferno.
I know, I know. I am a horrible, horrible person.
ANYway - I'm still trying to squeeze in time here and there to finish up my book. I'm SO close to being done...and I REALLY want to start on a synopsis and a cover letter to send out....
It'll happen soon enough I guess.
After a depressing Christmas day of going over and over various angles - we have come to the conclusion that his grandmother needs the sort of round the clock care that we are not qualified to provide.
Just last night I found her shuffling down the hall way without her walker, claiming to need some coffe and wanting to "let us sleep". She's already fallen numerous times and only by dumb luck has she not really hurt herself.
And despite all of the evidence, my husband and I still feel guilty that we are unable to quit our jobs and sleep in shifts to keep her in one piece.
We have looked into some reputable facilities, and have found two that are well staffed, very clean, and homey-loooking, and we're going to take Granny to see then next week.
*sigh* It's all very sad - but that's how it goes, right? We humans start out unable to take care of ourselves....and up up pretty much the same way. Granny has a PhD in Russian literature and has received numerous scholarly awards - and now she's reduced to wearing "incontinence undergarments" and laying in bed being fed potato soup and apple juice.
There IS one very funny aspect to this situation. Granny has always been a very arrogant, bossy, manipulative woman - and now that we are caring for her full time, she is straining herself to be something like gracious - and I know it's agonizing for her
It's always interesting to watch not-nice people try to be nice. It's kind of like watching Jessica Simpson trying to read Dante's Inferno.
I know, I know. I am a horrible, horrible person.
ANYway - I'm still trying to squeeze in time here and there to finish up my book. I'm SO close to being done...and I REALLY want to start on a synopsis and a cover letter to send out....
It'll happen soon enough I guess.
The fact that you have realized that the care she needs in beyond your means and that you are looking for a reputable place for her to go where she can get all the care she needs (and be as bossy and manipulative as she wants) shows a lot about your character.
And it's a good character ... not a bad one.
I love your analogy about Jessica Simpson. Nice one.
So .... you're writing a book? Any chance you might let someone peruse it ... like me?
*huggles* Don't stress yourself out hon ... things will work out in the end and you'll understand that it was all worth it and you'll be a better, stonger person from it all.
You are giving it your best, and that's all anyone can expect you to give. I hope the folks upstairs don't forget about this when you are old and need a helping hand.
That's why I try to always hang out and help my grandparents. When I am that old, I don't want people ignoring me, and not helping me. I also enjoy talking with my grandpa. He's a very smart man. He is the main reason for my conservative/libertarian leanings. I talk to him, and then I talk to all these liberal teenagers at my school who know everything and think anyone who disagrees is dumb. People tend to forget that the elderly are quite wise. Institutional memory is quite valuable in my eyes.