fuckfuckfuck.
unemployed again. ihave such a temper.
oh, trouble. i had such a fling with trouble, it seemed so long ago. and i'm sleeping with you again. you're nothing but trouble, but there's something about you i can't resist. something i'll never get over. you were supposed to be my first, only it didn't work out that way. you wouldn't let it. now i'm running around with you on the side and creating a whole mess of trouble. but what would my life be without trouble? lies, secrets, chaos, confusion, and trouble trouble trouble.
and there's no smoking allowed in my favorite diner now. the best place to sit and drink coffee and write or read or talk to whatever. it was the smoker's haven, open 24/7 and you can smoke like it's going out of style. well, apparently it is. now i feel like i can't even go there. the coffee was amazing, the food delicious and cheap, but if i can't smoke while scribble madly in my notebook or laugh with all my friends it feels wrong. i was planning on riding my bike there tomorrow [[today?]] and writing a new chapter but nicotine feeds my creativity and without it i twitch and block. by the way, i'm not addicted, i'm dedicated. oh, i feel like i've lost a home.
fuck, now i want a cigarette. [[...takes smoke break...]]]
oh, god. the innergoings of my head scares me.
requiem for a dream is a terrible movie to watch to try to go to sleep to. and sometimes, so is my life.
unemployed again. ihave such a temper.
oh, trouble. i had such a fling with trouble, it seemed so long ago. and i'm sleeping with you again. you're nothing but trouble, but there's something about you i can't resist. something i'll never get over. you were supposed to be my first, only it didn't work out that way. you wouldn't let it. now i'm running around with you on the side and creating a whole mess of trouble. but what would my life be without trouble? lies, secrets, chaos, confusion, and trouble trouble trouble.
and there's no smoking allowed in my favorite diner now. the best place to sit and drink coffee and write or read or talk to whatever. it was the smoker's haven, open 24/7 and you can smoke like it's going out of style. well, apparently it is. now i feel like i can't even go there. the coffee was amazing, the food delicious and cheap, but if i can't smoke while scribble madly in my notebook or laugh with all my friends it feels wrong. i was planning on riding my bike there tomorrow [[today?]] and writing a new chapter but nicotine feeds my creativity and without it i twitch and block. by the way, i'm not addicted, i'm dedicated. oh, i feel like i've lost a home.
fuck, now i want a cigarette. [[...takes smoke break...]]]
oh, god. the innergoings of my head scares me.
requiem for a dream is a terrible movie to watch to try to go to sleep to. and sometimes, so is my life.