madwithstars

well.... today was one of my numb days.....didnt feel too much like crying or anything.... didnt feel like laughing either... didnt feel....today. my mum pissed me off today. she really has no clue at all about who i am. she should... ive opend up to her in the past. but she has.... i dunno. ignored it.
ive been told by a few ppl that if i wasnt keepin my dad together hedve have a nervous breakdown by now. im glad i can be ther for him. of course i am. but..... this pressure. i cant deal with it. i can barely keep myself alive how am i suppose to take care of someone else? i will keep hold him up tho. i love him. but.... its so hard... on top of all the other shit goin on in my life as well. sometimes i feel like im about to burst......burst and explode....into a million pieces. fragements of me just... kinda..... floating in the air.
i like writing in this journal... i keep comeing up with more lyrics for my songs...... ive had a bit of a dry spell with my songs ... not anymore!
well im cold.... and im tired. and my bed is callin me. so im gonna go jumpminto it and let my covers hug me till i fall asleep.
alice
xxx