Sonofabitch
God has decreed that I will never be able to cook anything.
So here I am, looking for somthing to eat when I spy chips and some cheese dip. Now, I'm feeling courageous and since the microwave tends to do funny things to the dip, I decide to try to use the stove again. Mind you, this is only the second time I've used it since we moved in over 2 years ago. I figure, how hard can it be. Turn on the burner and set the jar of cheese dip on it. I know that if I leave it, the dip on the bottom will burn before the top gets hot so I know to stir it occasionally. As I finish up one of these stirrings and turn around, I hear a snap and then sizzling. I spin around to see my cheese dip flowing freely all over the stove. The fucking bottom of the jar just snapped right off! I desparatly tried to get as much of the dip off the stove as I could but I still ended up with burny cheese dip everywhere. It was burnt all over the burners, running down the front of the oven and all down inside under the burner. Fuck!!
It took me damn near an hour to clean all that shit up. I ended up putting the burner and the pan that goes under it in the dishwasher. I used about half a roll of paper towels scooping all the dip up from inside the stove. And the worst part is, not only did I have to spend all that time cleaning, I'm out a FULL jar of cheese dip.
And I'm still fucking hungry.
God has decreed that I will never be able to cook anything.
So here I am, looking for somthing to eat when I spy chips and some cheese dip. Now, I'm feeling courageous and since the microwave tends to do funny things to the dip, I decide to try to use the stove again. Mind you, this is only the second time I've used it since we moved in over 2 years ago. I figure, how hard can it be. Turn on the burner and set the jar of cheese dip on it. I know that if I leave it, the dip on the bottom will burn before the top gets hot so I know to stir it occasionally. As I finish up one of these stirrings and turn around, I hear a snap and then sizzling. I spin around to see my cheese dip flowing freely all over the stove. The fucking bottom of the jar just snapped right off! I desparatly tried to get as much of the dip off the stove as I could but I still ended up with burny cheese dip everywhere. It was burnt all over the burners, running down the front of the oven and all down inside under the burner. Fuck!!
It took me damn near an hour to clean all that shit up. I ended up putting the burner and the pan that goes under it in the dishwasher. I used about half a roll of paper towels scooping all the dip up from inside the stove. And the worst part is, not only did I have to spend all that time cleaning, I'm out a FULL jar of cheese dip.

And I'm still fucking hungry.

VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
eponine:
thanks for fixing my car.

qunybble:
you have two textbooks that just came in (sat)