Focus on those Calico eyes
Focus on my features not my demons Think of what we could, not on what we couldn’t.
Things are already progressing so quickly and were drifting, the things we could of are now sinking. This is all probably garbage and yes tarnished and I feel like I want to wench and start spiting.
Aggravated, agitated amply arguing with myself on the dos and don’ts, on the fight or flight and on the feelings. On the feeling of if you’re willing to let this go now you’ll most likely be willing to let this go then. Being caught up in this back and forth makes me nauseous, makes me cautious, makes me captive to the thought of locking up and shutting down and I should start to build a wall and after all with all that I have been through I don’t feel I’ll ever be ready for that fall again.
This time I am really set off, I am really put off, really put in a predicament where I feel like… why bother.
And that bothers me